h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Fair 'nuff. I think they're good.

They never work.

Marigolds on, ready to do washing up. As soon as your hands hit that water you can guarantee a sudden outbreak of biting itches. Grrrrr.

People who park on double yellow lines or in bus stops, but's it's OK because they have their hazard lights on.

Bookmarking conversations on h2g2. You think someone has added something but when you look it's someone who is just marking where they have read up to.

Might have guessed someone would do that

Back to the moaning

When you're reading a book at work or in a public place and some idiot makes a comment such as "you're trying to look intelligent".

Now what makes these people think I would waste my time trying to impress them? And who do they think I'm trying to impress when I spend hours reading at home? The mice?

. . . When you're trying to look intelligent, and people think you are just reading a book.

People who try to hard to be

cool
funny
intellectual
wise
an expert on (name your topic)
fashionable

Politicians kissing babies or trying to be trendy.
Jenny Bond fawning over the royal family.
BMW drivers (most of them).
People who drop litter within 10 feet of a bin.
People who drop litter everywhere else.
Sad tosspots who create computer viruses.

The royal family.

"Authority".

Good one.

People who refuse to acknowledge even the possibility that they might be wrong.

Huge great spiders who crawl up you bedroom wall inducing panic, and then when you've finally worked up the courage and got rid of it, another one in the bathroom.

Being awake at this time of night...it's just not natural without alkiehol...

Zantic

Or big spiders.