h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Or perhaps I'm fiercely loyal to the brainy set because they were nice to me, whilst I spent my childhood being intimidated by the typical american athlete types (american football players... *shudder*). Non-clique-ers weren't so concerned that I'm not model or cheerleader material.

if you want to find a nice, friendly girl, it would probably be best not to comment on her firm legs...

How could you comment on the firm legs of someone you hadn't found?

And why can't you comment on firm legs?

'Hi, I'm Xanatic, and I couldn't help noticing that you have firm legs...wait...come back!'

Well you can try it, let us know if it was a winner

But if you haven't found a nice friendly girl, how can you say anything about her legs anyway?

?

that should have been Obviously getting on the scales this morning is weighing (harhar) on my mind...

Well, why the legs? Why is it any worse than "Hi there, I couldn't help but notice you have a great set of hooters. Can I buy you a drink?"

Why is it any different, for that mater, from "I couldn't help but notice you have lovely eyes"? Why are eyes considered more acceptable than, well, anything below the neckline? It's like someone saying "hey, great movie camera. Is that panaflex? So, want a beer?"

I know all about "windows of the soul", but they aren't, really. Although nice eyes are good.

Yeah, it's still a compliment right?

Had much success with the hooter line Xan?

I always thought that a comment about what I was reading/carrying/wearing was better than something physical - something to imply good taste

That's true. But what is slightly puzzling is that the hooter line -- so to speak -- is actually regarded as offensive. It's almost as illogical as saying "f**k you!" as an offensive statement. You might as well snarl "have a nice day!"

Also a comment such as kelli suggests shows an interest in the person. Physical attractiveness is all very well but anyone who has any intelligence will know that if they are good looking then it is just an accident of birth and therefore is not that personal.

Erm, that doesn't explain what I mean very well, interest in what someone is reading or wearing is an interest in something that THEY have done or that they have made themselves. Rather than "bostin' set of wangers, luv" which (apart from being an excellent MCP term) is noticing something over which they have no control, there is nothing of their personality in it. unless they're false I guess.

Why do I feel like I'm digging a big hole here?

But, realistically, although personality is very important (and I really mean that) you don't know anything about the personality of someone you've just met.

People do like to feel attractive, though. You wouldn't go out with someone you didn't fancy even if you liked them a lot (I know because people who liked me a lot HAVEN'T gone out with me). I don't know. I mean, I understand that the hooters thing doesn't work and I sort of understand what the cause is, but I don't understand why that cause exists.

I think you can go out with someone you don't fancy if they just have "a wonderful personality." But it does seem stupid with the breast thing. They say you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover. But unless you've read it, that's really all you have to go by.

I haven't tried the hooters thing. When I give compliments they are usually ignored or I get strange looks. So I don't do that anymore.

I've never tried the hooters line ... probably won't either ...

... you can certainly spend a lot of time with someone you don't find sexually attractive and have great fun, but why take it in a more sexual direction when you have no desire to do so? That's just sex for its own sake. It doesn't really add to the relationship.

I'm way ahead of myself here, of course.

A comment to imply 'You seem like somebody I'd like to get to know' is preferable to one that implies 'You look like somebody I want to feel up'

You are right, you don't know anything about their personality except for what you can gather from their clothes/style/newspaper/bag/cuddly toy/whatever. My advice is to compliment on those things because you will get better results. You can all argue that women ought to take comments about their bodies as compliments ('nice tits' for example) but I'm telling you that they will be more flattered if you imply you think they have great taste or are smart or have other nice qualities.

I think Icotan got what I was driving at

Smart girls want to be beautiful, beautiful girls want to be smart. Somebody said that, probably true.

Also you don't love people because they are beautiful, they are beautiful because you love them. Someone also said that. And they do become more attractive when you love them.

I was only woolgathering. I know *what* works, I just want to know *why* it works. I never had any intention of trying out "nice tits luv" and I understand that most girls would rather be complimented for being good whole people.

Also, I don't know how to talk to people I have never met but who look interesting (and that does include, yep, reading an interesting book or reacting to events with unusual alertness or something similar) which is some advice I'd really appreciate.

Hmm. I seem to have given the impression I think rather a lot of things whereof I actually think the opposite. Just like life, then.

Just trying to give Xan a hand

Talking to strangers is hard - I have to do it a lot for my job but I still hate it - can't really give any advice because afterwards i have no idea what it was that I said, it is hidden behind all the panic.

k