h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*darts in alongside the giant Percheron - looses arrows at Sol and Titania - darts out again to a safe distance*

Help! Help!

Where is the Cavalry?

*rummages in pockets and finds the frying pan, carries on whacking*

*reaches for his tomahawk on the end of it's leather thong tied to his wrist and manages to parry the frying pan*

*slashes down hard with the Tomahawk whilst grinning evilly*

*galloping and rapidly closing with the Clydesdale and it's mass of struggling riders*

*slashes at Witty but partialy severs the girth strap by mistake. Bonnies saddle starts to slip*

connection has slowed right down again

*looks at the large slash in the leg of her combat trousers and loses her grip on Bonnie, falling to the ground*

Look what you have done to my trousers!

*renews her grip on the frying pan, and both shields and defends herself with it*

got no idea if this will post, hoping for a better connection in the morning

*dives down towards Two Dogs and Running Jello with a large cargo net in her claws*

apparently i can no longer sleep in during this expedition. sheesh!

*sea, who had thus far been unnoticed by all the jello indians, comes charging up behind, trying to decide whether she would be a help or a hindrance to the lot on bonnie's back*

*decides to go after the crazy indian in the bowler instead. guides her horse up next to him, and draws*

HOLD IT RIGHT THERE, JELLO!

*on back of prancing horse waving a shotgun and being beset by a flapping and irate bird*

Oh hello. I don't believe we've been introduced

*raises bowler with a hole in it*

Shame - was one of my best as well. I'm afraid I must we orf now. Been splendid chinwagging with you ! Pip Pip !!

*discharges second barrel at sea then dashes off towards Jello Wolf*

*unslings bow, nocks arrow and fires at Amy the Ant all in one fluid motion, whilst galloping flat out*

~ on the ridge watches the progress of the battle with grim satisfaction. Makes note to speak to Standing Jello about showing off ~

*sea fires both of her pistols as a man called jello shoots at her. his shot (fortunately) hits only her blouse, but tears the underarm to shreds. sea examines the damage, irritated*

oooh, that's it! that bowler is going DOWN.

*sea urges her horse forward, chasing her assailant*

*Witty loses her grip when the girth strap is severed. Fortunately, Bonnie has slowed enough so that Witty can slip to the ground unharmed. She rolls to a stop and ends up facing Standing Jello. She takes aim and lets a stream of boiling water lose at him.*

Take that!

*crouches low over the neck of his galloping horse he reloads his shotgun*

*wishes she had her regular guns instead of period revolvers, continues to fire at AMCJ*

~ZING~

*feels another hole appear in his bowler*

Now THAT is beyond the pale. Have you no manners ma'am. Just introduced and you are already taking frighful liberties with my attire !

*fires both barrels of shotgun*

~BOOM~ ~BOOM~

*sea's hat is obliterated*



*by now, sea is very close to AMCJ's horse. she holsters her pistols and jumps at him in an attempt at a flying tackle*

*as he looses another arrow at Amy, Standing Jello explodes in a mass of jello globules which plaster Witty from head to toe*

*Jello Wolf shakes his head and throws away the note*

*Running Jello sees what has hapened to Standing Jello and leaving Two Dogs to deal with Caerwyn he leaps at Witty and wrestles her down to the ground. He raises his Tomahawk for a killing blow*