h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Paul, I've just added you to my friends list.
How was your holiday? Did the library get its new furnace yet?

Hi, Mr. Christopher.

I've added you to my friends list, too.

My holiday was a bit longer than I had
expected. I drove out to my brother's
in Western Massachusetts on Christmas Eve.
By Christmas Day afteroon, the snow was
coming down so hard that visibility on
the roads was all but nonexistent. My
brother and his wife put much of the family
up for the night last night (There was
9 inches of snow at his place). We came back
this morning. Some of the secondary roads
were not well plowed. I skidded and got stuck
a few times. The highways were much better.
I'm at work now, so I got back safely.

I live in Jersey, and every Christmas Eve my family takes a trek from our house to our Church (south) to my grandmother's house (northeast) to my mother's best friend's house (far south) and then to my cousins in Sandy Hook (way north), all in that lovely blizzard.

That sounds like a "Traveling salesman"
type of situation, Mr. Christopher.

There must be a minimally circuitous
way of hitting all those points. Going
south, then northeast, and finally far
south would be a real hassle, even in
good weather.

Paul, go here http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/classic/F85075?thread=188497#p2100391 I think you'll like it.

Gorey is an acquired taste.
You need to think about his stuff for quite
a while before you realize what he was trying to do.
Not everyone is patient enough to do that.

"The Water Flowers" was a pun on the word "flour."
The people who stranded in a cottage for days
because of heavy snow had nothing to eat but
crackers and flour. Water and flour (hence "water
flowers") were mixed to make a nice sauce that
could be poured over the crackers to make them
seem nicer.

"Gashleycrumb Tinies" is too clever by half,
but it's infectious in its singsong rhythms
and quaint imagery.

A is for Alice who fell down the stairs.
B is for Boris (or was it Basil?), assaulted by bears...

Me thinks Tac is a veeeeeeerrrrrrry lonely man...

C is for Clara who wasted away,
D is for Desmond, thrown out of a sleigh...

I liked the one who drank lye by mistake.
Also the one who was bored through by an awl.



It has a very Victorian feel to it. Victorians felt that
children were very close to God. Maybe they were
influenced by the high infant mortality rate.
A lot of children just didn't make it.

what's that suposed to mean Lady Scott...


()

This old tac, he played ocht,
He played knick-knack with Lady Scott,
with a knick-knack, paddywack,
give a dog a bone,
This old tac came rolling home.

There once was a man named Paul
Who lived up north of y'all
with his pen he would pun
Till down when the sun
and to sleep he would fall

()

The sun never sets on my puns.

()

It takes a leap of faith to see
some of them as funny, eh?

No, wait, I wanted to tell a pun, but
I can't remember what it was now...




The only pun I can think of is the one
about the guy who calls the Chinese dentist.
"Can you fit me in? I'm in a lot of pain."
The dentist says, "Tooth hurty?"
"Two-thirty? Yeah, that would be good..."

"Was that a leap of faith or a jump of stupid?"
~ Paul Westerberg

I'm writing a song about NJ and I'll post it here in a little bit.