h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

sorry delayed reaction

no, but it seems i playing with a couple of queens!

we are trying to play a friendly game of cards...
could you please quit trying to shoot at me?
jeez huxley, i swear...
*puts a clothes pin on nose*
an top fartin too

*As the ground shakes JR finds herself in the unescapable grasp of the Minion*
*Using his tail the Minion knocks over a tree into the dungeon to free his friends*
We have you now my precious!!!!

where is the rest of your great tomato army now?!

there's a tomato for you DAFT dog! it's P-O-T-A-T-O!

*passes out from the vile stench of the minion*

*fuzzy climbs on the back of his trusty pet monkey, flap, and is carried to freedom...*
eat banana terd...
*throws at jr*

I don't think she can read death dog...JR you might want to call your friends because if you go back up a few paragraphs you will see that you are trapped in the "unescapable grasp of the Minion".

*the dog begind to taunt* tomato, tomato, T-O-M-A-T-O!

Ha Ha, Tomato!

Fuzzy, what should we do with the prisoner??
*confusing himself with his own question*

let's tie her up until her scared friends come and attempt to save her...
minion, give her a stink of your armpits...
death dog, destroy the restof their fortress and disarm all booby traps, collect their weapons and feed them to our sharks...
i feel we have won...
is their no one brave enough to fight us ?

sweet, i get to break more stuff! *BBBAAAANNNNGGGGG, CCCHHHUUUNNNNCCCHHHH!!!! CCCCCCRRRRRAAAAACCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!*

*smelling his own armpits in confusion, the minion passes out from his own stench*
Aarrgh.

*looking down at minion*
what a danghead...
*unzips pants and pees on tree*
aaaahhhhhh

*BANG!* you call these weapons? there are enough potatos here to feed and army! guys ya'll hungrey? you'd figure there would be more tomatos.

*waking up moments later the minion realizes that he had let JR go in his sleep*
Oh fart, I screwed up again didn't I?

TOMATOES, IS SOMEBODY TAUNTING THE P-O-T-A-T-O-E ARMY!!!
EAT THIS SUCKER!!!
*Fires a dealdy dose of potatoes filled with dog-eating termites at dancing daft dog*

*seeing his mortal enemy Captain in the distance, minion pulls out his battle hammer and proceeds to bat potatoes back protecting Death Dog*
Time to die Captain