h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*waves her card that says "founding mt. olympus goddess, retired, kicked Apollo's golden behind multiple times"*

I'd would battle you, if I hadn't retired on principle. But you seem to have two perfectly fun gods wanting to battle you right here. Myst is relatively new to the game... and apollo... well, let's just say he's battled a lot, and I think has only one win to his name, he'd be an easy start

*Disembodied voice* ill fight you myst runner *changes into the tall red head* ok now ill make the first move.......

Mystrunner's a nice one to battle... had a lot of fun in Shadar Logoth with him... but beware the concrete donkey!

Goddamn concrete donkey!

*Takes up The Heron Standing In The Rushes stance*

*takes the revealing just enough to make the guys sweat stance, a flash appears and mystrunner is surrounded by bright orange concrete donkeys* grey is last years colour!

*sits lounging on a huge squashy orange chair* lets see you get out of that then...... *taps foot and gices the nearest orange donkey a carrot from which it becomes alive long enouth to eat it* ..........................

Hmm... well, I haven't seen that before.

*grabs a carrot and tosses it at another donkey. Nothing happens*

*takes another carrot and throws it too the nearest donkey the same happens* its a granite carrot thats y it works

*Caper Plip practices her skills with a against the closest concrete donkey after painting on a mock goal with white paint.*

Nice hard surface here

*clicks fingers and six donkeys jump into forming a large goal with a white line being drawn by invisble hands* hope you like it

*Mystrunner strikes his sword on a concrete donkey. It begins to vibrate, and Mystrunner, with perfect timing, taps it solidly at it's peak. The vibrations increase, and a hum fills the air, gradually increasing in pitch. Soon, the concrete donkeys begin to crack as the whine reaches their resident frequency. In moments, they are but clounds of orange dust.*

Now then...

*Mystrunner stomps each foot, and a three-inch blade extends from the tips.*

Where were we...?

*the dust turns his white toga a rather putrid shade of orange*

Oops, eh, hehe...

Crap.

That'll do me fine!

*Twiddles thumbs*

*the orange dust whips of appolo's toga and surronds mystrunner he is unable to battle through the mist, the mist clears and mystrunner is tied up to an orange stone with some metal tightes !!!

Please, maybe use punctuation. It's hard to read otherwise

*Mystrunner grins. His form wavers, and dissolves into a cloud of mist, quickly reforming into his usual shape, outside the... TIGHTS?*

Ug.

*Mystrunner puts a open hand out at waist level, palm down. Slowly, he forces it up. The ground shudders, and then from the ground burst a leigon of the undead (ghouls, vampires, boegymen, etc.)*

Go my undead leigions! Tear her to pieces!

*Caper Plip nonchalently practises Roberto Carlos-esque bendy free-kicks into her custom-built net.*

*Watches Caper Plip in a bemused sort of way*

*waves hand* Now boys, boys, boys. I think we should all BURN. *a large flame engulfs the ghouls and ghostie's, it is so powerful that they all disentegrate and a large broom sweeps them away* I dont think so now tutut...
*waves hand and Mystrunner appears to be stuck in a orange log* wait a minuite *a shaking appears and he reapears stuck in a luminous yellow clown suit.... then the log reappears and lands on him...*