h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Oh my God! I see that Rob chose the Codpiece of Chaos to complete his outfit!

What we need here is a true full on Super Villain to test our Mad Lab Super Hero League of Justice!

*Scratches his Codpiece and Chips thoughtfully*

*TING!*

*a small meteorite crashes through the lab window, heading straight for NJA*

SMASH, BANG, WALLOP

*the scarlet buffaunt rushes to save the day, grabbing the meteorite and drop kicking it out of the door*

AHA.....

*Unfourtunatly during the heroic rescue the scarlet buffaunt is exposed to gene altering xetagammabeta radiation that splits him in two creating his arch nemesis the maroon skinhead*


(MS)- MMMWWWWWHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAA

An Arch Nemisis at last!

*Husky voiced and purring*


Oh...Myyy... Whyyy Hellloo Darlin'

ooh, good,

*the rocket launchers burst into life, causing untold damage to the teapot in the kitchen..*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH, NO DAMM IT,

*Turns away from the kitchen, only for the launchers to track in on the worst hairdo around, unfortunately, rob is in the way*

STOP THEM, THEY'RE OUT OF CONTROL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*The scarlet buffaunt leaps into action whipping his hair from side to side creating an incredible updraft that confuses the rockets and sends them homing in on the Maroon Skinhead*

WWWWHHHHHHHHHIPPPPP BLOOOOOOWWWWWWW


AHA.... *TING* *adopts heoric pose*


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

*wanders in looking lost*

*the Maroon Skinhead spots his oppertunity and seizes it he grabs the wandering newbie pulling him in front of him as a human sheild*

MMMWWWWWUUUUHHHHHAAAAAAAAAA
Now what are you going to do...

*the rockets stop in mid air looking confused they turn to Count jim and shrug*

*Turns to Camera*
Ahhhh, nothing quite like a cimactic battle between Super Heroes and Villains, eh dear Lurker?

*Furiously fiddles with the Codpiece and Chips utility belt to retrieve his Anti Confused Rockets Pill which he gulps down*

AHA! (TING!)

(hi pitched sqeaky barely audible voice)
ahem?
skuuuuuuse me? (standing in middle of room oblivious to mayhem, how did she get there?)
em em em,,, well. em. i'm looking for the doctor?

i have this em...terrifying medical problem, to do with a banana and a punnet of redcurrants.. (someone idly flicks a blackberry )SSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIK.....

and. well, ....em...i reelly need to speak with the doctor? is it a bad time? em... hello? (smiles nervously and way too widely to be convincing)

ok then...
thanks..i'll try outside shall i?
nice... emm wall thingie..

*grabs MS by the arm and throws him over his shoulder pinning him to the floor he takes a couple of steps back and runs planting a hefty kick firmly between MS's legs*

SMACK SQUELTCH OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHH....

*wince*

*SB leaps into action he dives for the MS and newbie but misses and crashes headfirst into irish blondie*

CRASH BANG WALLOP ROLL SMACK TINKLE...

Oopps......

*SB leaps to his feet and adopts a heroic pose*

*TING*

*Super Doc switches on his rocket back pack and swoops over to catch Irish Blondie in his arms before he careens through a wall, car, Tesco's next door, hayrick, chicken coup and a local Curry house....

CCRRRAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Tinkle tinkle tinkle!

Never Fear Irish Blondie! *lifts his mask to reveal.........The Mad Lab Doc!*

*Gasps from the lurking audience*

Tis I - what can I do for you sweety?

*Over his shoulder the crash bang wallop in the lab gets louder........*

*A cousin IT look-a-like with a robotic arm walks in*

Doc, I think I need some help!

While sitting at the bar over the weekend the arm must have made its way in here to get me a drink, and look what happened to me

*stands around looking confused*

*NJA whispers huskily into the ear of Masamune*

I will have you babies


*Grabs the monk and drags into the nearest empty cupboard*



*Squeals of laughter ensues from the cupboard*

eeeeeppp.......

Poor guy........