h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[When it gets to the Entering Hyperspace scene, there is a swath of light and colors clearly intended to nauseate the viewer. Then the Narrator Background.]

[Narrator] The Babel Fish is small, yellow, and leechlike, and probably the oddest thing in the Universe. It ... [etc. over]

[YK] Elbert, some of these guys look familiar. I mean, Zaphod looks like he's played by himself...

[Elbert] Oh, yeah. Zaphod Beeblebrox played himself. Nilap Ekim played Arthur Dent. Sila Mulan played Trillian, and Rocky Rhodes played Ford.

[YK] Ekim played Arthur? Oh, the part was practically MADE for him!

[Elbery] Yeah. Oh, and the Guide plays itself, of course.

[When it gets to the Entering Hyperspace scene, there is a swath of light and colors clearly intended to nauseate the viewer. Then the Narrator Background.]

[Narrator] The Babel Fish is small, yellow, and leechlike, and probably the oddest thing in the Universe. It ... [etc. over]

[YK] Elbert, some of these guys look familiar. I mean, Zaphod looks like he's played by himself...

[Elbert] Oh, yeah. Zaphod Beeblebrox played himself. Nilap Ekim played Arthur Dent. Sila Mulan played Trillian, and Rocky Rhodes played Ford.

[YK] Ekim played Arthur? Oh, the part was practically MADE for him!

[Elbery] Yeah. Oh, and the Guide plays itself and the narrator, of course.

[There is some creaking in the ventilation system]

Hey, I thought Affy caught all the Yaks...?

[Large quantities of *very* fluffy popcorn start to come out of the ventilators, looking very like a snowstorm but smelling of singed maple syrup]

Ahhhh. I think he's misjudged the quantities a little - I should have mentioned that, after the time I breached the warp core on a dried corn freighter and engulfed an entire solar system...

*Had re-entered the projection booth in time to hear that remark*

Hey, who's misjudging? This way we won't run out of popcorn to munch on. We're practically at the space station, but I'm for staying here to the end of the movie.

*Crow T. Robot looks at Affy and shushes him*

*Sits, enjoying the popcorn and movie.*

Hey, you know, I've never seen this movie!

*Fills mouth with popcorn *

[Elbert] Well, duh. The distance out the Mangar's been, it's a wonder you'd know about this week's fashions.

[YK] I don't care about fashion.

[Elbert] Neither do I. What else is new?

[YK] Nothing. Just thought you'd like to know: "Don't assume I share your opinion of the mainstream."

Would I be correct if I assumed that this movie is just a remake of the original BBC mini-series with a bunch of added jokes to make it run smoother, and new special effects so that it runs faster?

This one's a documentary...

So is the original Hitchhiker's Guide if you read the introduction carefully enough. It's not intended to be one, but the entire first book is little more than a commercial for the Guide.

*Stuffs even more in his mouth *

For Bob's sake, Peet, Affy, this is a completely redone thing for Tri-D!

I *prefer* to make fun of that.

*Watches Marvin's first appearance in the story*

This is fun. Just so everyone knows, we're back at the spaceport if anyone really *really* wants to leave. But I'm going to stay for the rest of the-

*Is cut off by a glare from Joel*

Which Spaceport? The one we just left? Why?

The H2G2 space station is a space port. At least, it has the facilities to be one.

[The movie goes on.]

[Eventually,]

[Zaphod] ... to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe!

[Narrator] /Arthur/ bruised his upper arm.

[Music: Journey of the Sorcerer. Roll credits over]

FIN

*GL stretches and yawns.*

Ah, it's good to be home again. All that's left for us to do is to take the treaty to the appropriate authorities here. Say, Affy - who are we supposed to deliver it to? And where did it get to anyways?

*Glances at Peet's shorts and discretely crosses his fingers.*

* Peet digs deep and offers the still-warm, barely legible treaty to Garius...

Don't worry, GL. We'll just cast the Caskly spell at it. Besides, the signature is still legible. Now, we just need to take it to the proper authorities. And that, of course, would be the current President of h2g2. You know, we've been gone from h2g2 so long that we've totally missed the election results. Let's go see...

*Leaves the Mangar, and exits hangar 42. He heads to a computer in the hallway, and gapes at the picture of President Peregrin*

Well, look at that. Guess it's off to President Peregrin.

*Affy runs back into the Mangar*

Okay everyone, great work! If the Mangar's ever gone on a trip again, we'll post here. And now, I'm off to find President Peregrin and deliver this treaty (after I run it through a Caskly machine.)

*Exits, treaty in hand*

*The credits roll, accompanied by the never-quite finished theme music, and several pictures of pies and other various pastries*