h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Supermoo. I wish a rematch with you. You embarrassed me last time we fought (Cow: You mean at your house? Me: No before that. Cow: At MY House? Me: THE PUN-IC WARS! Cow: Oh. That.) by making me wear sandles!

*bows to opponent, the cow* *whispers* If you accept my challenge I'll totally give you the five dollars i owe you!

what about the intrest...

I'm not paying you interest because you won't accept the money in the first place! !

*Duck comes in and starts getting angry with evilclaw and supermoo for multi-breaking the continuity and threatens them with a broom*

...*threatens duck with ducksauce...which has absolutely nothing to do with ducks to the best of my knowledge...*

*blocks charge and shakes her buckler at the guys*
Stay in one place
no duels with the duckis, people!
*points spear at them*

*snaps spear*

*Kat wanders in carrying an armful of what appear to be sticks*

Nicely nicely, and the duck and Elwyn are right. Stay in one place. I don't care if you have magic or whatever that allows you to be in more than one place at once. If you argue that I'll get the magicians in to cause a forced time tunnel and anyone trying to break continuity will find themselves in small pieces.

Anyone who wants PROPER combat training gather in front of me please. Elwyn has the right idea about doing something proper so I decided to run a few pieces to see what happens.

*gathers round*

*arrives from the torture chamber, having sorted out all leaving*

Combat training? I'm all ears. Not literately. Thet would be stupid. Well, go ahead, I'm hanging on your every word with this (again not literately).

*leaves the torture chamber* Training! I want to become better at stabbing things!

*glared at his retreating back*
If I weren't so nice I'd stab him
*smiles at Vice Mistress*
so, training...

she's offline

*pulls out sword*

lets fight

What'd I do?

duck

*swings sword*

*Kat tosses a stick to each person*

Okay as you'll see each of these is actually a bundle of sticks tied together. This is substituting for your sword because although we like competition, we don't like to lose TOO many assassins just from training. It tends to get messy. Now, seeing as we haven't done any training for a looonnnggg time I'm doing an assessment today.

Working together as a group, you have to attack me with your bundles at leaast once in what would be a disabling strike. Whoever beats me will get a prize. No magic will be used, just team-work and agility. Not only will this test you together, it will also see if you can follow the rules of continuity, free-will, God-modding and role-play.

*Kat takes a 'sword' and stands in the middle of the group, slouching like a cat and seeming as at ease as a child but as prepared as a cobra*

Begin.

kat is nasty
_________________________________________________________________

*leans on sticks*

I'm the vice guild-mistress. I'm supposed to be nasty. Anthea is the one who hands out candy, I'm the one who lays down rules. I'm the Head of the Inquisition for heaven's sake! Now grow up and take part please. I have no sympathy. Here have a bundle

*Kat tosses a bundle of sticks at BL*

*takes a stick and slams the stick Kat is leaning on*