All things must pass. All things must pass away.⁶
-George Harrison

For the first time in history, I should like to put my Full Ceremonial Title. It is this: Arch-Blump Presently¹¹, The Cynic; Chairman of the H2G2 Awards Council; Co-President of the Brunel Fan Club¹²; Ex-Assistant Community Director¹³; Guru; Keeper of Silly-Ba-Billy Type Poetry, Highly Fascinatingly Interesting-ish Stories and Most Other Types of Thingammajjigeebbobbers to Which I Like (Quite...) and Possibly Other Such Things to Which I May or May Not Like (Including Some Forms of Music and Musical Instruments)¹⁴; Member of the H2G2 Musician's Guild; Muse of Physics and All Related Topics, Subjects and Things¹⁵; Pianist at the H2G2 Symphony Orchestra; Royal Musical Conductor for the Kingdom of Balwyniti (I'm a Q¹⁶, too!). Note Bene:¹⁷ you don't have to memorize this.

I have joined the Guide because I fell that I have much to contribute to the Guide. Some might be silly, some might be informative. However, you will be able to rely on its accuracy (unless otherwise noted).

I have many interests ranging from music (The Beatles, Chopin, et cetera) to physics (and I do love physics) and most things in between (Star Trek books, philology, radios, curling, golf, card games, winter....). I also
have an affinity for writing and acting.

Too ¹⁸, I love India and I think I might go (but, not to Goa). There, I will indeed see the Taj Mahal in Agra.

But this is me only in a very small nut-shell¹⁹.
I thank you for wasting your time on reading this²⁰. Good-day.

	I'm a Brunel Fan!
	Brunel: Skin of the Future

If you are like me and you enjoy the new skin that was introduced with the uprgade to DNA 1.10, you'll be interested to know that, now, you can show it to the world! by enrolling in The Brunel Fan Club. Simply visit the folowing link, make certain you qualify (as you probably will; there's nothing serious) and join! The Fan Club's Home Page can be found at: The Brunel Fan Club.

Everyone likes to feel special. Everyone likes to get awards. At the H2G2 Awards Council, we've taken the best of this and put it into one. So, get your awards here! Simply go to the Home Page, start a conversation saying what award you want and why and, PRESTO! you'll have your very own award complete with Certificate and the entitleation for you to put that award in your name. What could be better? To get your award, visit: The H2G2 Awards Council

Ladies and gentlemen (and things, if there are any), I am very proud to present to you the first of my own campaignes. These campaignes have been in the workings for quite a while now and the first of them are now ready. It is the campaigne against James Joyce's Finnegans Wake. So, if you'd like to join up, please, just click at the following link. It shall take you to: The Home of the People Against James Joyce's Finnegans Wake. However, if this one is not for you, I am also making a fan club for Gormenghast. Indeed, this following link shall take you to: The Home of the Gormenghast Fans. Watch this site for more up-dates!

I have been wrighting for quite a bit of my life. However, very few are the persons who can say that they have seen my writing. Some might also say: "And for good reason!". However, there are those who do not have a not-so-quiet appreciation of what I write. But, I am going to let you decide.

If you would like to see how I wrote this site (Id Est: In it's original GuideML format), please, click here.

If you would like to see my conversation, please, click here.

If you would like to see your own conversations, please, click here. Or, if you are using Brunel, simply click on the My Conversations button, located on the left and third from top.

If you would like to know who else is on-line, please, click here. Or, you can see who is on-line at any time by clicking the Who's Online button in the taskbar (Brunel: On the left, fourth from top, Alabaster: At top and bottom, third from the left, Classic Goo: On the left, third from bottom).

For many years now, I have lived in a house that is quite old ²⁴. It has very old doors. Now, because of their immense age, I have often had to repair them. So, one day a few months ago, I started a guide entry about about how I went about fixing them; just some generall tips are what I gave. Well, I put it up for Peer Review, a few people saw. And now, it's been recommended! Now, I shall attempt to control my absolute JOY! None the less, I have good reason to suspect that, one day (hopefully sooner rather than later), it shall be accepted in to the Edited Guide. And, today, it has.

• The Article was written by: Yours Trully.
• The Article got a suggestion (which I put in) from: Whisky (Scout).
• The Article is being edited by: Researcher PSG [Minister of Impossibility and Improbability] - Peace! [Scout]
• The non-edited article version is at: this location.
• The edited article version (which has been accepted into the Edited Guide) is at: this location.

A. C. E.

Back to Section Top

Please note that, before you read on, I have defected from the A. C. E.'s. I defected to... The Guru's.

In life, there are some events in life that, admittedly, are more special than others. Your first step, your first word, your marriage et cetera. On H2G2, there is no difference. Some high-lights are: your first guide entry, your first title, your first conversation and, your first title from The Towers. This honour has just been bestowed upon me. Now, of course, we must all attempt to show some form of neutrallity but, once in a while, we can afford to show the convivialism inside. I, however, shan't show it unless forced to. Hey..., what are you doing? Oh no, I feel my convivialism comming on... It's time to convivialise! If you'd like to find out more about the Assistant Community Editors and what we do, please, visit the following link. It shall take you to: The A. C. E.'s Home Page. Or, if you like, you can click on the large badge at the top of this page. It shall take you to the same place.

A little late (but better late than never (and, in fact, I am a bit embarrased not to have put this sooner)) but here none the less is the blurb about my first title; The Cynic. Now, this title I recieved a while ago and I am still very proud of it. If you would like to join The Cynics, please click on the following link to: The Cynic's Guild (it is also, in fact, the home page of Hunter the Cynic, and his merry band of homemade comic characters. ( Click here to join the cynic's guild, we're still taking m)). Once there (and you qualify with the qualifications), just ask to sign up! It's that easy!

Jai Guru Deva. Om.

You may be asking yourselves why I am using that phrase as one of my sub-headers. Well, firstly, I love the Beatles and expecially that song. Secondly, look at the words. Jai Guru Deva. Om. Can you guess why I used it now? I've been made a Guru. Why? Because I asked to be! And, becasue I feel I am competant enough. So, if you have any questions, ask away and I just might know the answer. If I don't you can choose from one of the others. You can find us either at The Guru's Homepage or on the dropdwon menu provided, for free!, below. Ende.

I am immensly happy to inform you all that I am now Keeper of Silly-Ba-Billy Type Poetry, Highly Fascinatingly Interesting-ish Stories and Most Other Types of Thingammajjigeebbobbers to Which I Like (Quite...) and Possibly Other Such Things to Which I May or May Not Like (Including Some Forms of Music and Musical Instruments)²⁶. Though this may seem like gibberish to some and plain old long and rubbish to all, I can assure you that I chose it with carfully thought out consideration and I am quite proud of it. The following is a link to: The Home of the Keepers.

More excellent and good news! (It just keeps comming!) I am now also an official MuG (a. k. a.: Musician's Guild)! The following is a link to: The H2G2 Musician's Guild.
This group of people are a group of people who have grouped together because they have (at minimum) one (1) thing in common: they share a passion for music. I have joined this group for the same reason. I love music: I play music (mostly on the piano but, I hope to change that next year to include the Sur Bahar²⁷), I sing music (I'm biased to the Beatles. Sorry.) and, in fact, I have been in musicals! It is for these reasons that I asked for membership and was granted. If you would like to become one (and you feel that you are qualified), all you have to do is ask politly and they will (most likely) recieve you with open arms!

And, as of the 26 of January, 2002, I am now also a Muse! I am Muse of Physics and All Related Topics, Subjects and Things. Now, what exactly does this mean? I am, when reviewing this Museddom, Muse of everything (seeing as physics constitues every thing in the known universe. Also, with my inclusion of all related topics, subjects and things, this further increases my museship to include every thing in every universe). If you think me pompus, you are incorrect. I am trully quite humble. The following is a link to: The Musehome.

I am very sorry that it has taken me so long to put this up ²⁸. But, I am now an official pianist in the H2G2 Symphony Orchestra!²⁹ and I am very proud of this. However, I shall admitt some thing. I am glad that this is the H2G2 Symphony Orchestra because, as I have told many people, I refuse to play in public. However, if the orchestra for some reason came across the ocean to where I live, I might participate. Now, I might seem pessamistic about this (I'm a pessamist) but I am very honoured to be a part of this. If you wold like to join (and they do need lots of strings still), please, click on the following link. It shall take you to: The H2G2 Symphony Orchestra

I am proud (yet humble at the exact same instant!) to announce that I have been accepted into the (almost holy) Kingdom of Balwyniti. I am The Royal Conductor (to express the musician et cetera ³⁰ within). If you would like to visit the Kingdom, please, visit it by clicking on the following link. It will get you to: The Kingdom of Balwyniti

Post Scriptum: If any one can tell me how much a bagpipe would cost in Canadian dollars, please let me know.

Post Post Scriptum: I would like to know why so many reaserchers have so many names in parenthesis. How does one go about
getting these?

Post Post Post Scriptum: If any one knows how to read and write shorthand, please, let me know.

Post⁴ Scriptum: If any one knows Latin, do not hesitate to tell me.

Post⁵ Scriptum: If any one knows where I can find an audio clip of a Sur Bahar on the internet for me, do tell me.

Post⁶ Scriptum: I found one so you can disregard the last post scriptum.

Post⁷ Scriptum: You can disregard the first Post Scriptum.

Post⁸ Scriptum: You can disregard Post Post Scriptum.

If you'd like to E-Mail me, please, feel free to do so. Simply click on the folowing link, type your H2G2 name in the subject and, as if by magic! I shall respond. Ready? Alright. Click here!

Alright. If you've come this far, I think you're entitled to know that I have Ithica (ICQ). So, if you want to contact me, I'll give you the ICQ#. Sort of. I'll give you the formula to get it; simply plug in the numbers and, if you're right, you'll get me. If not, you shan't. If you do find it out, please say in your opening message your H2G2 name and that you solved the euqation. So, here it is. Oh, you aught to note that it isn't fully finished yet.

(Pi less the decemals) + (The number of rulers of the U. S. S. R.) x (Number of Beatles) - (Number of time zones back from G. M. T. Montreal, Canada is) x (Number of Star Trek movies as of the First of January First, 2003) x (Number of Star Trek series as of January First, 2003 (including the animated series)) - (Year the Beatles broke up) + (The answer to life, the universe and everything) x (the number of characters in the sentance: "How much wood can a woodcuch chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?". Hint: it isn't 54 and it does not include the quotation marks.) + (the number of dots or dis in the number 5 in Morse Code) x (number of petals in the ICQ flower) + (number of keys on a standard telephone (not the hold, redial et cetera keys)) x (number of meters in a kilometer) - (number of digits in the number 63) x (number of hole in Blackburn, Lancashire acording to the song A Day in a Life by The Bealtes) x (the par of a regular golf course (it's 42 + either 20, 30, 40, 50, or 60.)) + (the number of holes in a regular golf course) - (number of books in the Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy Trillogy (if you will))