h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Luckily for Alex, Cisco and Caitlin, they got an unexpected telephone call from Stephen Strange who works as a professional shaman medium. His abilities are very powerful as he can instinctively know when anyone needs his help.

When the phone call ended Stephen Strange arrived at the site of the cursed wardrobe. The shaman medium-sorcerer burnt sage sticks while dancing in a circle, while reciting several chants to restart time and to repair the unstable climate.

The phone-caller asked you in ? I answered, I don't know ? I'll go check..
I put the phone down in case I wasn't

I just got back from watching "Frozen II." The bad news is that global warming will cause the next sequel to be called "Unfrozen."

Stephen was working on how to banish the curse. He found that it was caused by the Demonic Lord Mephisto who was fed up with him because he was not getting any attention as Thanos was stealing all the limelight which put Mephisto in a foul mood.

I went out to feed my pet duck. Suddenly he opened his beak, showing sharp teeth, and he attacked me, for he was in a fowl mood.

The international meteorological assemble computer models are gleefully predicting months of non-stop rain for the whole year for Ireland and the British Isles.
They even got a machine to push Ireland and the British closer to continent of Europe, to increase their chances of wet, wild, mild and stormy weather.

Be afraid!
Be Very afraid!


(ok, it's been done before)

My country had been stricken by drought for seven years, so imagine our delight at hearing that a huge rainstorm was heading our way. The catch was that it swerved into the country to our south.

People all over the world are getting what they wish for; and now the world is filled with super-powered people with magical powers (as in Harry Potter) who are extremely wealthy and living in the world of John Ronald Reuel Tolkien's Middle Earth and Joanne Kathleen Rowling's magical world of Harry Potter. This scared all the world's political leaders as they were now unwanted and the world was filled with giants and dragons.

The good news is that the people with super powers have lost them. The bad news is that when extraterrestrials arrived, they fell in love with the taste of human flesh.

Wet, wild, mild, windy weather that will bring thunder, lightning and hail storms that will cover the whole of Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England through the month of December.

A super-hyped up jet-stream will be winding it is way through London and the South East of England bringing chaos that will cause the Tabloid newspapers to go into meltdown.

- I thought you said it was safe enough to build a nuclear power plant in this earthquake zone?

- Build it, yes, but I never said it would be a good idea

I figured that if a nuclear power plant could safely be built on a fault line, a china shop would be safe, too.

Turns out the nuclear power plant ended up creaitng the China Syndrome.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_China_Syndrome

I was walking across a cemetery late one evening when I suddenly met an ominous creature that scared me which made me scream out loud - and then of course immediately apologize.

- I understand, he replied, - I didn't like surprises like this either - back when I was alive ...

Received an automated letter stating that due to poor results, I had immediately and irrevocably dropped out of university.
One prof had forgotten to submit my latest results.

(sadly, this is a true story, though it wasn't me)

Tower bridge merged with London bridge making it twice as scary as it swayed and would shake like jelly.

It looked like London was completely abandoned as though all the inhabitants completely disappeared.

There were many derelict buildings with shattered windows with rubbish strewn everywhere.

Already flora and fauna had taken over London where descendants of escaped animals from London zoo where roaming the city.

A night under a full moon I met a Shepherd who suddenly bit me which made me yell "hey, what are you doing, who are you?"

- I used to be what you are - only now we are both were ...

I went into a building which had an eerie glow and immitting pulsating sound which started to low and became louder as I walked through to the back room.

I saw whirling whirlpools appear through the ceiling and the floor as I attempted to open the back door into the garden.