h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well done, GL... I should think the brigg would be fine... CO might be...erm...willing...to give us some information regarding the Horrible Somethings...

*Walks over to CO menacingly, and pulls a hideous looking device from pocket. It looks like a cross between a corkscrew, a hypodermic syringe, a mechanical hammer, and a common phaser*

With the captain's permission, I think I can get *ALL* of the info out. Including the stuff buried so deep that even CO can't remember it. Or wont'.

*Grins evily*

*BS appears on the bridge with a couple of red shirted extras*

Maybe we should get him to the brig first?

EMH: Hmmm, I may have the expertise of over 1000 of the best medical officers that ever lived but even I need a hand.

EMH: Computer, locate the Chief Medical Officer

COMP: Dr. Croz is outside Weapons Locker A

EMH: What iss he doing there?

COMP: Dr. Croz has remained stationary outside Weapons Locker A for approximately 22 hours

*Taps holographic donut*

EMH: EMH program to the bridge, If you would have bothered checking the crew positioning system you would have noticed that the Chief Medical Officer is outside Weapons Locker A. Could someone go and get him?

On my vay EMH
*Checkout leaves the bridge to get Croz*
*Finds Croz coming to*
Dr. are you alvight?
*Helps Croz to his feet*

*Shivers and looks a bit on the cold side. Scans himself with a medicorder (that makes nice beeping noses and looks like a cotton reel) to check he's ok*
I'll be alright. What happened exactly? The last thing I remember was being shot at by a talking inertial dampener who hadn't had a medical.

I'm going to sickbay to get some brownian motion inducer and I'll make sure BB's ok.

*Picks up the stolen snowzar and walks back to the weapons lab with it. Stops by the Sick Bay to get some aspirins and a bandaid for a small cut on elbow. Smiles at BB *

I'm sure the MO will be back soon.

*Leaves and goes back to the weapons lab. Takes chair and moves it to the other side of the table, facing the door. Resumes work on the anchovie repellant.*

shivering as he slowly defrosts

sits up.
Whats going on where am I.

I'M B L I N D
My Eyes

the motion detectors turn on the lights and CO realises he's not blind.

Phew close one
now to work on my escape plan....

I can't leave you lot alone for five minutes, can I? Well, I've been entertaining the Ambassador from the French Tutorial for the last 4 days now that I'm away from free net access..

Anyway. Welcome, Ensign Checkout.

*makes mental note to re-read Star Wreck books*

Hmmm. so, one of our inertial dampers is a traitor, eh? Good work, everyone. Well taken care of. Mr Bluebottle, after you're back on duty, please re-lay-in the course for Ebola VI, if we hurry we can get there before the other Pizzar ships.

Carry on.

*pweesh*

Thankyou Keptin, but i'm a lieutenant...
*makes himself look busy on the bridge*

...Someone make sure that there's someone guarding CO...I don't want that inertial dampner escaping, OK...and I'm more than sure that the Captain doesn't either...

...And make sure that there's no way he can get back inside the ships systems...an inertial damper's likely to know the insides of this ship better than even DD...*worried look*

So Doc, is it true that I can be checked out?

*Grins*

I doubt I know the ship better than DD, but I believe I know it well enough to guard a traitor! Especially since I 'revamped' the holding cell that CO was placed in. Right about now, Co should be . . .

*Distant buzzing noise. Lights on ship dim slightly then come back on at full*

Yes, I modified the secret door. You know, if it weren't such a good plot device, I'd just hit 'im with a snowzar blast that would take a year or so to defrost. I'll stop rambling now and go guard the prisoner.

*Walks off while pulling a LazerWhip (Another fine product of Crater Labs, Inc.) out of his pocket*

BB, you're cleared to go back to duty. Please be careful and try not to get into any more life threatening situations, that's what the guys in the red jumpers are there for

*Makes a mug of brownian motion inducer and then starts work on designing a holonurse for the sickbay*

*Level 12 Section 13B Subsection 231*



Hello anyone I'm trying to find my quarte.... er... a neddle in a haystack and require some assistance, I'm next to a big grey door in a long grey corridor with flashing lights on the walls. Anyone have any idea where I am?

looks around for useful items to aid in his escape.

a plan comes to mind and useing an old trick he learnt in the orphanage constructs a full size model of himself, using only the matrees a shoelace and some beans he found in the corner of the cell.
CO make himself ready and hides.

Makes Gurgling noises to sound like he is dying in an attempt to lure the guard into the cell.

*The guard hopes CO will die, as then he can go to the Holodeck for an hour or two and not have a prisober to worry about.*

*pweesh*

Hmm, is that course set in yet?

*examines conn*

Hmm. Nope.

*sets in course, engages*

Yeah, warp speed!

WHOOO!

Ahem.

*looks around, blushing slightly*

Right. I'm off to the pub. Uhm... the ten-forward.

*pweesh*

*Checkout decides to take the helm as the bridge seems deserted*
*Stares out of viewscreen at the wonderous sight of doughnuts streaking past at varp*
*Checkout is so absorbed by the sight that he doesn't notice the doors to the bridge go *
*Still fails to notice CO sneeking up behind him brandishing what looks to be a tin of beans*

*E too had been mesmerised by the viewscreen...she barely noticed CO sneaking up behind Checkout...*

*However, she did notice...and CO noticed she'd noticed...then Checkout noticed that E had noticed something...*