h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I can deal with that. Let's say that during the night you disappered for no adequately explored reason.

*sigh* I wish more people would become h2g2f4 addicts. Now it's sleep time again, what a bore.

* While Lampwick and Ribald are sleeping, Azrael sits on a rock a short distance from the camp. His attention is drawn to an ant that is climbing over his left boot, carrying something. Just as he is about to take a closer look, a leather bag lands between his feet with a jingling noise. Startled, he stands up and begins to draw his sword, only to find that it is somehow stuck in its sheath. Before him stands a person in a dark cloak, facial features completely obscured by the shadow cast by the hood. *

[Azrael] Wh..

[Cloaked person] I'm hiring you. Half of the money now, other half later. All I want you to do is kill the people in those tents.

* Azrael looks surprised. *

[Cloaked person] What? You're an assassin, aren't you? You've done this sort of thing before, haven't you? And there's a lot more money in that bag than you'll ever get from that shoddy church.

* The look of surprise turns into a strangely dazed look. *

[Cloaked person] Take.. the.. money... Kill...

[Azrael] Kill...

* Azrael turns around, chrouches down and pulls out a dagger. Meanwhile, the cloak falls to the ground as if it were empty, and then ~through~ the ground, leaving no traces but the leather bag. *

[Ribald wakes up and sits up]

[Ribald's Brain] Uh-oh ..... hidden warrior instincts detecting outside threat. Going into battle-ready mode. Must hold stealth above all else at all costs.

[Ribald] [grabbing his sword and leaping upward] YEEEEE- [hits his head on the tent ceiling and falls forward, getting tangled up] -HAAAARRRGGGHHHH!!

[Ribald's Brain] D'OH!

Oh, the suspense! I guess you'll have to live with that for a while, because I'm going away for a while, and I won't have Internet access for a while, and that means I won't post for a while, and the story won't progress for a while.

Anyway, I'll be back next weekend, if not earlier. See ya!

[Lampwick picks up all his stuff for no readily apparent reason]

Sorry for the delay.


* Azrael, realising that Ribald will soon come to his senses, raises his dagger and lunges at the warrior. *

[Azrael] Yaaaaah!!

[Ribald manages to get himself free, realizes that in 2.58 seconds he will become chopped liver, and swings his sword upwards, parrying ferociously.]

[Ribald's Brain] That's it, keep 'im back!

[Ribald] Shut up!

[Ribald parries again and jumps backward to give himself some breathing space. He is right next to Lampwick.]

* Azrael, blinded by his greed, decides to pull out the stops. He throws the dagger aside and draws his sword. With a grim look, the blazing sword reflected in his eyes, he attacks forcefully. *


I just realised something. This is one of the very few ways to create real suspense in a free-form role-playing game. PC vs NPC? Feh, boring. PC fighting for his life vs PC blinded by greed? I've actually caught myself wondering what the outcome will be.

I see. That's all only academic in this case, though ... I think.


[Ribald jumps backward, bumping Lampwick's tower of items. Lampwick loses balance, and it all falls sideways onto Azrael, burying him.]

[Pause.]

[Lampwick] I didn't do it!

Ah, the classic "beat" -- the correct term for comical pauses, I believe.


* Emerging from the heap of tents and assorted adventurer's items, Azrael is now blinded by both greed and rage. In full berserk mode, he rushes Ribald like a one man army, hacking and slashing with the fire engulfed blade as he goes. The rising heat of the flames seem to mirror his highly unstable frame of mind. *

[Azrael] YYYAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGHHH!!!

[[Tidal Wave]]

[Ribald summons Leviathan, who knocks Azrael over again.]

Could the blade be so warm that the water evaporates before it touches Azrael? Assuming of course that the heat doesn't affect the caster.

That would be silly.

LOL

With Leviathan, you can't evaporate ALL of it with just one sword. That's one of the reasons his skill is called "Tidal Wave".

Ok, I wasn't very clear. I didn't mean that the sword should evaporate ALL of the water, I just meant that it might evaporate everything in the vicinity of Azrael, leaving him unaffected. Surely, Azrael wouldn't get hit by all of it? (And I thought it was called "Tsunami", or is that just for summoning?)

I should've seen this coming. This is dangerously close to becoming a player vs player argument instead of a PC vs PC fight.


* Azrael's consciousness and the flame of his sword are extinguished by the tidal wave. He is washed away by the strong wave and placed gently beside the leather bag and the stone he was sitting on a few minutes ago. He groans. *

[Ribald] I wonder what's up with that? (Lampwick, pick up our stuff.)

*a lone horse rides up with an elf sat atop*

Hi everybody! i'm Lizzy!