h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

My Christmas bonus this year will be the mini-keg of beer I opened to do a bit of quality control

You're up early and I'm up late.

Not up early, just late getting into the brewery. Normally left home an hour ago

As a volunteer, I run our village hall. People seem to think I should be available to make bookings 24/7….

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-35170590

Prime Minister's Christmas message.

Reported on the radio as Britain is a good place for people of all faiths and none, because of the values of the Christians in charge (I paraphrase a little).

Shame that the rest of us can't catch up with the Christians.

PP.

Powercuts.

<BB<

People who get an address wrong, even after you've corrected it - twice. My tablet had to go back for repair. When I spoke to the Tech Support man he asked for my address. I told him and he asked, "Did you say 14?" I said, "No, 13, one three." The packaging and paperwork was sent to number 14. Fortunately our local postman was alert and spotted the mistake. I corrected the address on the paperwork so that the tablet would be returned to the right address. On Christmas Eve I got an email from a courier telling me that a package would be delivered on 29th December - to number 14!I I had to contact the courier to change the address.

The tablet was sent to Samsung on 23rd December. They received it, fixed it and sent it back on Christmas Eve. 10/10 for quick service. 0/10 for checking the paperwork to make sure the return address was correct.

Today's PH - the way hubby packs a suitcase. I can't bear watching how he stacks everything as though in drawers, no thought of filling in odd spaces. I've allocated him some presents to pack - hopefully the most sturdy ones...

People who keep going on about the so-called North/South divide. This week, following the floods, the Mayor of Leeds in interviews said 'This would not happen in the south'. So, how far north are the Somerset Levels then, eh?

Apparently according to the PM, in the last 5 years over £100 million has been spent on flood defences in Yorkshire. The amount spent on sea defences on the Isle of Wight in that time is £200,000 - with the eternal campaign to get the funds to have the Totland sea wall rebuilt, which would cost £2million, still ongoing.
There are 5 A Roads on the Island. One of them, the Military Road, may be permanently closed because no funds to repair it following coastal erosion in 2009 has been granted.

Now, though I recommend you take the figures with a pinch of salt, am I missing something?

<BB<

PH - my office. I'm on my own this week, and the factory downstairs is closed. So, more than usual, we are sitting on a huge open space. If I put the heating on, it heats up till I am almost asphyxiated with the stuffy air. But I still have very cold feet

PH today: "automatic" doors which don't open unless you push the button off to the side somewhere to open it. This is usually after you've done a little dance trying to trigger the "automatic" door, not realising it is only automatic after you've pushed the button.

So like a "manual" door, then.

Deb

My PH on addresses is those automatic address finders on websites, where you can't then edit the address they find!

My brewery is in number 75, yet they address finders keep filling it in as 75-76. I've nothing to do with 76, I've never seen anyone in it. For all I know it could be filled with freezers full of dead bodies! I certainly don't want it on any of my contracts or accounts paperwork.
Yet trying to get people to change it so it's not got the 76 on there is a nightmare!

The address finders are tuned to the near future, by a year or so to a timen after your brewery expansion.

The expansion is in a couple of months when we double the size of the premises and build a bigger bar

Not really a Petty Hate: optic neuritis. I've had it since before Christmas. Reading anything is awkward, but reading a monitor or tablet is really hard. I haven't been able to check my email for more than a week. Even watching television is strange. Posting this was a bit of an ordeal. Hope it clears up soon.

CD


Interstate highways that suddenly turn into long narrow parking lots without any warning!

Just spent almost an hour on a stretch that should not have taken 15 minutes

F S

Wet socks.

My pet hate is when I putting the washing out and it rains (when on the weather forecast says it's going to be a rain-free day) and my washing becomes wetter than when I first put out.

I was going to say something about places that have made clotheslines illegal, specifically parts of California, but after a brief search, I was pleasantly informed that California just passed a law legalizing drying your laundry au naturel.

http://laundry.reviewed.com/news/california-passes-law-to-legalize-use-of-clotheslines