h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Plain peanuts? Why would a consumer not want their natural protein bundles wrapped in layers of salt spices and sugar ?

"natural protein bundles"

Does that carry on to the protein in my body? All protein must be surrounded by salt and spices at all times

Not even peanuts still-in-their-shells (or is it husks?)

not enough time. why oh why do i always find the christmas break for uni never provides enough time to ACTUALLY write whatever you have to or revise sufficiently or whatever. just because i am in the house does not mean i want to be social- i do have university work to do.

PH of the day, sloppy documentation.

Just because your service has moved on to version 2 doesn't mean all the devices using it are capable of supporting version 2, which you acknowledge by keeping version 1 running... but remove all documentation for version 1!

Yes Google, I'm looking at you!

Hey digitally man, tally me parameters
De liver day come an me wan' go home

It's actually incredibly annoying. Most Android devices actually in use are running 'droid 2.2 or there abouts. Yet Google have moved their maps plugin so that all the documentation is for 'droid 4 onwards. Yeah, whoopee, not helpful for the real world. Sometimes I do wonder if Google actually spend any time *in* the real world.

Whoops! Wrong place

Ah, but it fitted.

part-time colleagues who are lazy
do nothing
and when they actually do something, it is to plan their whole holiday for 2013 without even remembering there are 2 full-time colleagues in the team who both have school-age children.
They have taken all the "bridge days" and the summer holidays

Frozen food packages with the cooking instructions on the strip that you rip off to open it.

Sodding computers that say "this operation has been disabled, contact system admin" when trying to save work/powerpoints/the map to the centre of the earth/a diagram pointing to the location of X. We're students, we do have to save work once in a while.

In this case it comes up then lets me save anyway. Annoying piece of...

The screw-threads on bottles, especially on small tonic-waters, that just fit the rim of your glass.
If you pour not quite carefully enough, click - dammit!

Winter lurgies that disrupt weekend plans, and make me all stressy and

Now we are in the coughs and flu season and novo-virus is rampant the growing number of people who can't be arsed to cover their mouths when they cough or sneeze.

Our pizza delivery service. They have 3 sizes of Pizza. If I order "small" I don't want something the size of a dustbin lid. And today there aren't enough people in the office to share an order with. We're still in the holiday season, half the people are off....

My ability to shut down any public transport

I'm not quite sure how I manage it, but far more than either the national average (which is already high, i admit) or any other member of the my family - I break the trains, the tube, the buses

It doesn't half make for long journeys

Politicians constantly referring to 'hard working families'.

Slap.

PP.

A long-standing not-so-petty hate: being short-sighted (near-sighted). Lately it's got worse. I used to be able to use the same glasses for distance and reading. Now I need separate glasses for reading or close work. I even need them when I use a computer. Please don't suggest varifocals. My lenses are expensive enough as it is. I don't want to think about what varifocals would do to the cost of a pair of spectacles.

Petty hate; websites which don't return you to the page you wanted access to once you log in. Especially bad in academic journals, etc but happens all over (consumer magazine, which? does it).

You spend ages trying to find an article, you find the article, you need an institutional login to read the article, so you login, and lo and behold, you're welcomed to the site and sent straight to the home page . Sometimes you remain logged in when you use the back button, sometimes not..