h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I love ironic post's!

Yes, I have a manual for a BB gun that says "When shoot finish no pellet in barrel reload and Play It Again." There are loads of mistranslations. Of course, sometimes they don't have to be mistranslated to be incomprehensible. Scott Adams has a good take on this. I'll go look for it .

Want a ? Many funny tlansrations at http://www.engrish.com

Great site

http://www.engrish.com/recent_detail.php?imagename=womanlike.jpg&category=Signs/Posters&date=2003-08-11

Er, what?

Pet hates? dont get me started.


Ok....

1) that square toilet paper you get on trains and in some pubs
2) crap/slow/old drivers
3) people who think "Last of the Summer Wine" is funny
4) saying "congratulations" on someones birthday. What are you congratulating them on, exactly? not being dead? managing to stay alive another twelve months?
5) Rugby-centric Welsh media
6) Opera go-ers who fail to see the irony in them being ripped off to watch fat birds screaming. Get down the Occy in Bangor on a Saturday night instead. Thats only a fiver

- people in concerts / theaters / cinemas who keep talking or making other noises (no - not the ones on stage! )

People who arrive late for football matches and then leave early as well. Why f***ing bother at all? Tw*ts.

I've never been able to work out why people leave football matches early if their team are losing. Do they think they are making the players feel guilty?

no loyalty, mate, thats the bottom line

When programmers cancel a much loved regular show to put in something absolutely cr*p.

When programmers put a show you'd like to see at some unsociable hour, so you can never seem to catch it. Or, when they keep juggling the show-time around, with the same result.

Linkin Park. These crap-rockers got booed off the stage in Dublin, when they were supporting Metallica ('Fight Free Music!'). Which made me happy.

Being put on hold, then constantly reassured that Microsoft corporation is incredibly grateful for my patience.

Lars Ulrichs, when he threatened to sue all Metallica fans wanting a free copy of "Enter Sandman".

I have decided, after today, that I also hate, well, get irked with, people who sit next to you on the bus and then won't get up or swivel their legs out the way when you want to get off, effectively trapping you in the corner and making you miss your stop. They don't budge when you ask. they don't even budge when you stand up, tap their shoulder, and ask to be let past. And then they say, after it's too late "Did you want that stop love? Sorry.' I could smack them.

Next time, I will shed my ladylike image and simply climb up onto the seat and trample them flat.

high school freshmen. individually, most of them are alright, but having to share halls, and the bus, with them ... ugh.

My own timidity.

This one isn't so petty. *Ascends soapbox* National exam boards for their sheer incompetance and refusal to ever admit that they are fallible. Do they not realise that it's a kids future they so brazenly mess up? The whole system is a disgrace. *Descends soapbox and shuffles quietly off*

*Gives standing ovation*

Coming back from holiday. Not the fact that it has to happen 9oh well, that too) but that it always takes so long and that there are ALWAYS delays...

Zantic

Beaurocracy and fundamentalists.

Sachets of shampoo and conditioner you get free with magazines. Space saving for your gym bag ? Only if you remember to take scissors with you. Impossible to tear at the groove. So either end up with mouth full of shampoo as you try to rip with teeth or continue to try and tear open with hands. 4 hands at this stage would be beneficial becuase usually end up squeezing out of tiny hole and no free hand to collect liquid so ends up on the shower floor.