h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I´ve now signed up for a singles student dinner for valentine´s. There should be about 60 single people of each gender. Let´s see if I´ll have better luck there.

So no one else is having problems?

I have a date tommorow. With another Iranian surprisingly enough.

Well done, Xan. Relax.

So no one else is having problems?

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RF

I think Clive knows this thread, he´s been here as long as I have.

It seems the girl I was meant to go on a date with got cold feet.

When a woman tells you you´re a real gentleman, you always know you´ve just lost whatever chance you had with them.

Not necessarily, it can be just a compliment!

I was at a party last night, and that Iranian who got cold feet was there. To begin with she didn´t know who I was. She didn´t apologize either.

*sigh* I know about 4 women who are still in town.

So what's your plan for going out and getting to know some new ones?

I´m going to keep an eye on arrangements over the summer, and head to some of those.

Hmmm ... haven't really commented on this thread before ... I've tried the dating scene over the past few years ...here are my thoughts (which I believe apply fairly equally to both sexes) ...

1) 95% of single people are single for good reason. Occasionally you'll find that diamond in the rough who is between relationships, or just never steps outside themself to meet people.

2) in logical deduction from point 1, I went through a patch of a year of believing there are no 'good' people left out there. If they were good, they'd be firmly in relationships. Funnily enough I didn't meet anyone during that year while I believed that.

3) Next I looked at myself and at good friends I know, of both sexes. I realised that actually I have some really good single friends, or others who didn't meet anyone until their mid 30s. People who would be good life partners for anyone. But due to a lack of effort, shyness or belief on their parts they hadn't met anyone. Started to believe there are good people out there who are available you just have to look.

4a) If you want to meet someone you have to make an effort to go to places they will be.

4b) Once you start going to those places and meeting those people you have to actually make the effort to talk to them and ask them out. (That was the particularly difficult part for me).

5) Dating isn't easy. There are:
- people you meet who are totally wrong, so you don't date them.
- people you date who are nice but you have no chemistry, attraction to or anything in common with; so it goes no further than a date or two.
- people who you date, who you like, get on well with; but then it fizzles out after a couple of dates with no obvious reason. Make the effort, but don't chase.
- people who you date, who you have great chemistry with, there's some kind of strong physical attraction; yet a few months down the road there's something missing.
- a select few who are great, and you fall in love with them very quickly then you have to manage that so you don't scare them off!

I thought I might get a second chance with that Iranian, but that doesn´t seem to happen either.

Without exactly knowing the situation, I'll refer to you point 5c of my previous post on that one, and in particular the last sentence.

Well, the date never happened in the first place. I guess I got stood up. Seems it´s not happening this time either.

Yet you've been through some good times where things have seemed to go well for you, Xan.

Yeah, I had a year where things went well. Sadly it´s been business as usual the last few years.

I was at a barbecue last night, and this biochemist girl was there. I talked with her for a while, and made her laugh. She seemed interesting. I thought I might have a chance but sadly it seems she´s in a relationship.