h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That's what happens when you start going philosophical... hangovers tend to do that
I think I meant that you can't judge on what your place is, especially on the basis of your work, cuz you don't know what your place is in life, there's far too much of it left to live. Yeah, that'll make sense!


I think I've previously mentioned; Fuzzy's mum is coming down at the weekend, which is totally cool. But last night, he says to me "don't worry if it sounds like she's interviewing you, she just chats in an interviewy type way"! I said well I'm not being interviewed for anything so that's cool! Then later he said "don't worry about being anything with mum, just be yourself cuz you're wonderful"! Which is nice, but I hadn't intended to be anything else. I don't see his mum coming down as any big deal, cuz we're just friends - if we decide to get together later on down the line then that's later. So I'm still cool, except that I wonder what he's been saying to her! It seems he's looking at this as the "My Mum Officially Meets Queegle" type deal (much like Bronners' "J Meets The Cousins" thing), and he's waiting to see what she thinks of me in the field of future prospects.

Think he's still in 'we'll be married one day' land.

Been away from this thread for a while.

Still a lot of anxious "old" hands here I see.

It's hard not to worry about hooking up with someone nice or even just someone willing

It can happen for anyone one of you especially as you are all interesting and chatty people as the evergrowing backlog proves. Just chill out and let your personality do the work out in the real world too.

The grand canyon is a thing of beuaty created by the steady work of flowing water and the wind. Take a look at your average quarry created by sudden powerful explosions and they ae generally a big mess.

This is often the problem with schemes for quick results.

Sexual chemistry is there or it aint and a crush aint chemistry. So dont worry if a NFG you have the hots for doesnt reciprocate. Just hang out with people you like and respect and who like and respect you, be honest with yourself and them. Then wait to see what time brings.

one love

After a quick re-read of the article, i think one thing that jumps out is;
'Talk to girls as if they were guys not as if you're trying to pull them.'

I find girls find this attitude very refreshing, though it can be quite difficult, especially if the girl is very cute and you get tongue tied.
Though i've found some girls are so permused by guys talking to them like this, that they think the guy is either gay or just not interested.

I gave the advice of talking to all people as if they are peopleway back in the thread.

To be fair you are right some people do get caught up in the way that other people type cast them and begin to assume their given role as office stud, class princess, village idiot or whatever in everything they do and evrywhere they go.

If you meet people like this it can be frustrating if they wont drop the role, so I understand your apprehension in talking to "beautiful women", but often people who have been type cast in a certain way do love the opportunity of wearing a different hat and being spoken to in a different way. Dont let outward appearance put you off finding out what some one can be like when they are given the chance to be something other than their "role".

Remember the wider your circle of acquaitances and friends the more likely you are to meet someone who will dig you like you dig them. It could be the sibling of a person you meet on a train the child of someone you work with or the friend of a friend.

I find it helps to create a kind mental wall between you and the girl, this allows you to talk to them as if they're just an ordinary person.

The only danger is over doing it and coming across as distant or 'on another planet.' In my case this resulted in most peopke thinking i was either permanently stoned or that was a Doc Brown from Back to the Future esque mad scientist.

Exactly Ged, you just end up being seen as "just a friend" or gay. I think part of my problem is I do it too much, because I don´t really know how to try and pull.

Hi Xan,

"I don´t really know how to try and pull."




Either do or do not. There is no try.





More usefully, 'trying too hard' is a bad thing. I found my current NFG without any 'trying to pull'... so it can happen.

No one is ever pulled.

The secret is convincing them that you are willing to catch when they have decided to fall for your charms.

A friend would trust you to be there if you arranged to go for a drink together. A NFG will only show the signs of wanting to go on a date when they feel confidant that you are "interested". Being friendly and interested in people is not the same as being "interested".

So what are you going to do to show these NFGs that despite not being a predator you are willing to bite

one love

"I used to do what Bouncy's Dad suggested"...huh? Where did this one come from?

Huffers, I meant that the really really charming blokes are invariably male whores who've had far too much action.

You can have too much?

Hi Gang, what a flurry of posts there's been since my lunch break yesterday. I'll bash out my while scoffing my sweet and sour noodles. Chances are that I'll drop stuff all over my keyboard but that's another story...

I for one do not like the stance that the "Pook" guy describes on the Don Juan site. I am sure that following his suggestions would give you a shell of arrogance over an interior of vulnerability and lies. Okay so you might eventually turn into the confident characture you're pretending to be, but what is wrong with being a bit shy?

I much prefer a quiet guy who'll give me his whole attention without competition from any other girls he might be stringing along. Confidence is fine but this article is too confident.

Just be yourself guys and girls - there's someone out there who'll love you for who you truly are and not who you're pretending to be.

Bouncy:
As far as I can tell...
A guy with a lot of experience is a guy who knows how to make girls say yes
A girl with a lot of experience is a girl who doesn't know how to say no

Did you really mean that that way round Huffers?

On the basis of recent experience, might I remind everyone that a bit of praise will always make someone warm to you. I received some this week and immediately praised another colleague because I'd forgotten how good it felt, and wanted to share the feeling.

As long as it is honestly meant, it will cheer everyone up no end.

And as I have said before, if you want it to have an effect on an NFG it is best to praise something they have done (something at work, something they've cooked, or anything else productive or creative), not something they can't do anything about (big boobs or nice skin).

The more you practise on people you're not necessarily trying to score with, the easier it comes when you have a target to aim at.

Oh yeah, definitely practice on people you're not trying to score with. I found it really helps. I would never used to because I'd worry that some person would think I fancy them when I didn't, and worried about hurting folks' feelings. But if you're like that with everybody, that's unlikely to happen. The people who are special still get that little bit extra from me.


And how could a week go by without something happening in the Queegle & Fuzzy.. 'thing'! ...

Last night he said he's decided to tell his mum exactly how he feels about me. She knows bits, but he wants to be completely honest with her, which is cool. He reckons he's going to do it towards the end of her stay here, but no way can I see him keeping it till then!
I said he should do what he feels he wants to do, but to have a bit more of a think, taking my responses into consideration, when he's sober. (We weren't last night but had had a few .)
Also said, I'm going to be away for 2.5 weeks in a mere 9 days, and yes he'll miss me to begin with, but his view may have completely changed by the time I get back.
Still concentrating on being chilled about the Mother visit. After all, if I'm just me, if she decides she doesn't like me, there's not a lot I can do. Apparently she's not one to overreact, which is nice to know.
And now I'm blathering on, so I'll get myself a large water, , and to rid my body of the vague hangover I have.

I should dye my hair red more often....


Guys, definitely go with the advice of instead of trying to find 'one' person to concentrate all your nervous efforts on, just be fabulous with all the girls, marrieds, mums and grans included.

Hmmm, let´s just hope that doesn´t mean she starts pressuring him and you then. So he can stop his gay ways and she can have some grandchildren.

She won't be pressuring, cuz I'm not a 'proper' Christian! The 'gay ways' stopped some time ago.
I'm aware I could be wrong, I've been in a long-term relationship before where it turned out everything he had told me about his life was lies. All the more reason that it's a good thing we're taking our time.

He's decided he want to marry you already and that's taking it slowly?

yeeees. But I've had the feeling for months that he'll be in my life forever. Which is why it's better to take things slowly, and go through the whole 'dating' procedure. As Xan said, there needs to be a middle ground between "I like you" and "let's get married"!

*If* it happens.

Yeah, you've got time yet for all the serious stuff. For now just enjoy getting to know each other. Marriage is a big thang and best not rushed into IMHO.

Keep it slow and smoooove, baby