h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"It's impossible to be unhappy in a poncho." - Vince Noir (rock 'n roll star), The Mighty Boosh

I invented the mullet - Also Vince Noir

I know Telford isn't the nicest place to work, but is seems a bit extreeme to brainwash your employees into thinking they don't actually work there

At least he's thinking, it's not his fault he's bad at it.

There was a great line in the Comic Relief episode of Casualty (or was it Holby?) and I'm not sure if it was supposed to be funny or not. Charlie was talking about how poor modern comedy is and remarked: "I haven't laughed since Eric Morecambe died".

Please enlighten me. What does " " mean?

erm

No, I mean what kind of 'erm'?

Is it: erm, I don't know what GRJ is talking about
Is it: erm, I find that in bad taste
Is it: erm, I don't know why GRJ finds that funny

or what?

probably "erm, I don't know why GRJ finds that funny".

Possibly cos' I don't find it that funny myself.

I am not young enough to know everything.

When the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers.

I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Ms Lewinsky.

consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

I've got a voodoo acupuncturist. I'll just be walking down the street and I'll suddenly go "Oh, That's better!".

Steven Wright

'football isn't a matter of life or death-it's much more important than that' -Bill Shankly

There is no gravity. The earth sucks

We're all gonna' die. Get used to it.

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.