h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

What a woman!
Thinks: "We should all take lessons from her....."

*looks at kiddo, perplexed*
what are you on?!

{still sobbing}
Anybody seen the Crab? or Tweetie? Please?
{sob}

*Having given up the search for the civil servants (for now at least), Dan returns to camp it seems empty, except for Galaxy Babe.*

I saw Tweet running towards the hospital tent a second ago, but I have no idea where the crab is.

*Dan briefly wonders where his tribemates are, but is almost sure they are fine.*

*Almost.*

*sees MK lying on the beach

*desides the night is too long to spend alone... goes and lies beside him, staring at the stars...

*as she leans towards him to get a kiss he pulls back slightly...

Right. I'm off to go find EV then. humph!

*storms off to the jetty...

* The supplies of fresh water have all but been used up... *

* M.K gloomily walks into the camp... *

Ah...well.

Hmmm... It's a little hard to broach the subject, and I've never been known for subtlety...

...but would all the males here please go away a fill one of these little plastic cups up please.

The viewers have demanded that the father of Tweetie's child be known...and as they pay for the revenue of the show. The audience is always to be obeyed...

Apparently, Doctor Bruce has pinpointed that the suspected 'happy' event took place during a wild party at the end of the first week on the Island...

* M.K looks at G.B, G.B looks at the pretty sunset... *

Anyway, thankfully that puts me out of the frame... which is just as well, considering my alimony payments already total in the thousands already...

Anyway, I would hope we have your co-operation in such matters...

Thankyou...

M.K*

i'd just like to say that i am NOT dealing with any of that stuff!!!

That reminds me of a joke....but it's a visual one, sorry! I couldn't possible type it....

Well, I haven't been to any party during my stay here, but I'll fill it up.

You'll *fill* it up?
Now who's bragging!!!

--- ROFL !!! ---

* M.K wanders back into camp carrying a large yellow envelope... *

Hello Everyone, in my hand are the results of the test the Islands male population 'volutarily' submitted to yesterday...

* M.K ponders 'Thank God that's now on film !!! Just incase any legal suits come from this gross violation of liberties... ' *

Anyway...

* He rips open the yellow package...a drum roll starts *

Please F.C !!! Your not supposed to be enjoying this !!!

* She puts down the sticks & looks away from the admonishment... *

Well now...the father is...Hmmm...the father is...

* Kes faints... *

The father is Demon Drawer !!!

* DD faints... as does Tweetie... *

M.K*

*Green light*
Really that's strange 'cos I thought that I.....err...yes well I'm very happy for you of course.
*Green light*

Is this Imaginary City, or what?
Tweetie already told us that she's NOT pregnant!
On the Hospital thread!! Days ago!!! Poor girl, hasn't she been through ENOUGH with a SCARE like that....without you all carrying on the storyline like this! You should all be thoroughly ASHAMED of yourselves!!!!!
*GB stamps her foot in a further display of anger
*storms out

*Tweet walks into camp, swaying her hips in a red snakeskin bikini*
*She crosses over to GB, but passes by MK on the way*
*There's a deft motion as she draws level*
*Tweet moves on, and MK falls to his knees, groaning*
*A smile crosses her lips*
*Hugs GB*
Hey- it's ok, I'm ok. And I know how to handle Mr Executive Producer over there

Hnnnnnnnnnnnnn

*A ghostly shape flickers towards the camp hut*

*Thankfully, nobody is around to see it.*

*Having been split in two by MK a week ago, eats' soul hunts for his body*

*The deserted Yapong hut, built with love and care by the group two weeks ago yields nothing for the ghostly apparition*

Hnnnnnnnnnnn......the forest I think......

eatsmice? was that you? or just part of you? where have you BEEN? we are all waiting for you at Survivor - The Aftermath....http://www.h2g2.com/F49657?thread=71596 doh! Do I have to go flying through that dense forest again????

*A ghostly grey apparition floats in to the camp, following memories of events in a search for its other half*

*Memories........Kes hurtling into camp......eats body baling out before Kes has a intimate meeitng with a tree.......eats splashing into the water.......Kes calling out.......Kes cuddling up with a pink lemur.......a body....floating beside the beach......*

*The grey apparition drifts above the shoreline, toward the rock pools that held the lobster pots.........and then a body appears......*

*still, motionless, the ghostly molecules of eatsmice hover above his body......it lies on its back, staring heavenwards, sightless, peaceful.......*


*From a long, long, long way away, a pictish spirit voice echoes across the beach....*

C'mon manny, get yersel back in there......there's serious drinking to be done laddy.....and you're letting good booze go to waste....

*A flicker of movement......a coming together of body and soul and the body jerks into life.......*

Oh mah heed...........

Where's everybody gone?
Oh...an aftermath.....

*Picking up speed, eats only pauses to collect gold from the hidden beach and heads laughing and giggling towards the aftermath.................*

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa