A Conversation for Ask h2g2
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 Started conversation May 15, 2003
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
I've recently been diagnosed as having bowel cancer. Since I enjoy writing, and this site definitely encourages it, I got this idea of creating a guide entry about me and my bowels (charming thought) and adding to it from time to time. Jottings, really - symptoms, what I'm getting up to, what the medics are doing to me, personal reflections, all that sort of thing. A commentary on progress.
So I've started an entry at A1050986 - there's nothing in it right now, but you might like to bookmark it. Whenever I update it I'll post here, so if you subscribe to this thread you'll be notified. Then if you have any comments you can post them under the entry itself, rather than here.
Obviously I've no idea yet what sort of response this will get from you, the great hootoo community. I mean quantity as well as type. Honestly, I'm not doing this to try to extract lots of sympathy from lots of people. On the other hand, I won't deny that the occasional virtual hug in the middle of another difficult night could be just the ticket if I'm feeling low. But that is not the main purpose, and to be quite honest I don't really want great floods of sympathetic but dutiful smiley-type posts (especially if I'm on a slow connection!) Sorry, but that's how it is. On the other hand, I don't want complete silence either. Awkward b*****d, aren't I? That's one of the symptoms, you see, getting grumpy and bad-tempered. Anger is another. Why me? etc.
So what is the purpose?
Partly it is that the actual process of writing about it and putting it on the web like this will help me in various ways - help me clarify my own thoughts and feelings, help me cope with the problems, help me express myself.
At the same time it might help others who read it, who perhaps have had similar experiences or know someone in a similar condition, or even who recognise the symptoms (which I may well describe in gory detail), and go and get them checked out instead of ignoring them.
Then again, it might spark off useful other discussions in the community, maybe even contacts between other people that don't involve me at all.
And it's probably a good idea to have more frank discussion about cancers and stuff that even in the 21st century still all too often gets swept under the carpet.
Anyway, what do you think of the project? Is it a good idea? Do you have any tips or suggestions for me? Or should I just stop waffling on like this and, er, get my finger out?
Bels
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Teasswill Posted May 15, 2003
Best of luck to you. I think it's a good idea, hopefully will be therapeutic for you, educational for readers & enable all us well-wishers to follow progress.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
dasilva Posted May 15, 2003
to you Bel, as someone who's being 'investigated' right now (not for cancer yet but that may yet come) you have my sympathies, my thoughts - and they can do wonders thesedays, never give up
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
There is only one thing worse than being Gosho, and that is not being Gosho Posted May 16, 2003
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Teuchter Posted May 16, 2003
And me!
Sending you lots of good wishes - and no smileys since I noted your comment about them slowing things down at your end. Have a hug anyway!
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Tabitca Posted May 16, 2003
subscribed..good luck bels ( a hug) be thinking about you.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
World Service Memoryshare team Posted May 16, 2003
And me. Good luck, Bels, in all your endeavours!
I couldn't agree with you more about cancer being a taboo subject, so I think its marvellous what you're doing. So here's to you and your future good health!
Big hugs,
Anna
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
ismarah - fuelled by M&Ms Posted May 16, 2003
Well, I'm sure you'll be fine and we'd love to hear so from your own typings...
go kick some cancerous @ss
cheers ismarah
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 Posted May 16, 2003
Thanks very much everyone for all your kind messages.
I've written about 1000 words so far on what's been happening over the last few days - now I suppose I've got to decide whether I really want to post it onsite.
Someone else told me the other day that they dithered for ages before posting some very personal stuff onsite. My stuff is not nearly so intimate, but I guess I'm still dithering.
I'm much more used to researching and writing for Peer Review. Even then, I dithered and polished for ages before finally taking the plunge with my first entry. And this stuff is totally different.
So I haven't put anything up yet. I'll see how things go over the weekend.
In any event, by half way into next week there will have been some further developments to write about. It's all happening a bit fast, and I'm still trying to catch up with it all.
But I'm really appreciating your feedback here - keep it coming.
Bels
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Researcher Eagle 1 Posted May 16, 2003
I hope you find love and acceptance here online if not in the "real world." I remember that when my mother was diagnosed with brain cancer, I lost friends and my family lost friends because some people just couldn't adapt to being around someone who was sick with a potentially lethal disease.
May you have friends and family who will be there for you in every aspect of life no matter how rough things get for you.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
dasilva Posted May 16, 2003
Bels,
I've a very dear friend who's just gone through an op and chemo - it will happen fast, probably so fast you wont have time to think until it's done...it can be a blessing *hugs*
Just remember we're here. Post, don't post, it's your choice.
Let your friends be your weapon of choice *smiles*
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 Posted May 22, 2003
OK, I've posted to the entry at A1050986. There's more stuff happening today - I'll write that up later.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Abi Posted May 22, 2003
Hey honey
You and your family are in my thoughts.
love and hugs to you all.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
ismarah - fuelled by M&Ms Posted May 22, 2003
I don´t really know what to say, so bear with me here.
I have IBS, which gives me many of the symptoms you´re currently experiencing and it´s far from fun. But one can live with it, in my case because I know it´s nothing more serious. I think the chemo, assuming you have that, will probably be more uncomfortable, so things will get worse before they get better.
But don't give up. It is very very important that you maintain good spirits and keep fighting. If you give up and accept that death is walkingup your garden path, then you will die.
Doctors turn out to be wrong. They can´t tell you why someone with a mild form of skin cancer died after a few months, while someone with breast cancer made it through, except to say that it is a question of attitude.
I´m sure you´ll correct me , was it Dylan Thomas that said: 'Do not go gentle into the night'... 'rage against the dying of the light' and that´s what you need to do. Trust in your deity of choice and fight your @ss off.
I do hope you´ll be ok, that at least you´ll enjoy your life as long as you have it. Prayers/pints all round, really
cheers ismarah
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Mina Posted May 22, 2003
Hi Bels,
I'd just like to send my best wishes to you and your family.
I'd really like to say that if there is anything we can do, please just ask, but this sounds too much like a cliche. So instead I'll say that we're thinking of you.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 Posted May 22, 2003
Dear all, thanks so much for your kind messages.
Since you ask, there _is_ indeed something you can do for me, and it's this: Just drop in from time to time and say Hi. I know it can be very hard to know what to say, and easy to perhaps sound insincere or trite. So just ignore all that stuff and just say hello. It's really that simple.
I expect there'll be times when I'll go quiet for a while, and those are specially the times when a quick hello from someone can make all the difference to a gloomy day.
So no polished prose required, just a wave or a hug or something now and again.
I'll be writing some more soon.
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
Teuchter Posted May 25, 2003
Hi Bels
Just dropping in to say hello.
I've been thinking about you and Mrs Bels a lot this weekend while I've been gardening. You're probably still feeling a bit shellshocked just now? But I hope you've managed to grab some good moments along the way.
Hugs to you both.
Key: Complain about this post
Bowel Cancer and Me - A1050986
- 1: Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 (May 15, 2003)
- 2: Teasswill (May 15, 2003)
- 3: dasilva (May 15, 2003)
- 4: There is only one thing worse than being Gosho, and that is not being Gosho (May 16, 2003)
- 5: Teuchter (May 16, 2003)
- 6: Tabitca (May 16, 2003)
- 7: World Service Memoryshare team (May 16, 2003)
- 8: ismarah - fuelled by M&Ms (May 16, 2003)
- 9: Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 (May 16, 2003)
- 10: Researcher Eagle 1 (May 16, 2003)
- 11: dasilva (May 16, 2003)
- 12: Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 (May 22, 2003)
- 13: Abi (May 22, 2003)
- 14: ismarah - fuelled by M&Ms (May 22, 2003)
- 15: Mina (May 22, 2003)
- 16: Teasswill (May 22, 2003)
- 17: Bels - an incurable optimist. A1050986 (May 22, 2003)
- 18: Whisky (May 23, 2003)
- 19: GreyDesk (May 23, 2003)
- 20: Teuchter (May 25, 2003)
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