h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Get your point, Alfster, but Corinth was honest about his motives in the end and apologised. Funny that this thread has kept going on a straight road ever since, though - one of the longest-running threads on the site.

He apologised? Why? It seemed a cheeky but innocent thread.

Don't ask me - it's somewhere back in this thread. Anyway - it's better forgotten.

So due to the change in the rules for residence for foreign students, someone is arranging a speed dating event to help foreign students in need of residence permits meet Swedes. It might be worth trying that.

There's some kind of pick up artist workshop on thursday. Might be worth a look.

Being a "pickup artist" sounds like something you'd end up in jail for.

Pick up artistry is basically using questionable psychological techniques to coerce emotionally vulnerable women into having sex while making them think it's their idea and that they really want it.

So, on that basis, I hope you didn't go.

So I might be dating someone. Not too sure really.

So... the things happening in my life right now made it seem appropriate to resurrect this thread.

Recently I've decided to give online dating a re-try*, because I'm not very good at meeting people in the usual ways. So far I have concluded mainly that I am literally the only polyamorous-and-looking person in the whole of Wiltshire.

I mean, there's nobody at all. Plenty in Bristol, and Oxford and London and so on. I'm chatting with a very nice lass from Oxford right now, which I'm content to see how it goes without making assumptions seeing as how I increasingly think that maintaining a binary distinction between friendship and relationship as somewhat ludicrous and rather stifling, and now approach all interactions as essentially fluid; things go where they go, be that friendship or ing.

Anyway, I'm digressing a bit. The point is, I'd like to meet other poly people who are local to me even if it's just to chat and have a nice with them. I'm not even asking for advice here, just being frustrated. Bah.

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*Did it for the first time a few years ago. Head was on wonky so it didn't go too well, and yet somehow I ended up meeting someone very dear to me.

Well it does seem a bit much to ask for, don't you think?

No, not at all. I mean, why would wanting there to be polyamorous people I can meet socially in an area of 1,346 square miles be a bit much to ask?

I did have a lovely picnic with some Welsh poly people at the weekend though.

Just finding someone you'd want can be difficult, let alone someone you can get.

I am currently exploring a connection I made when I wasn't looking for one. It is not currently physical but it is more than simply friendship.

Society teaches us that romance is a matter of 'wanting' and 'getting' when in fact it's simply a matter connecting with the right person at the right time. We are taught we DESERVE to get the girl, which is massively unhealthy. We are taught that we cannot be happy unless we are in a standardised form of physical relationship, which is massively unhealthy. We are taught that it is a binary state of 'relationship/not-relationship', which is massively unhealthy. Letting go of conditioned notions of romance is something more people need to do.

And I know that it's easy for me to say this from the position of being in a stable relationship and being Poly, but it shouldn't need to be. We shouldn't be conditioned to view relationships the way we do as a society. We shouldn't buy into the myths Hollywood spoonfeeds us about The One, and Happy Ever After and, above all, that not being in a relationship is tantamount to failing at life. We should not define our happiness or our identity by our relationships with others.

>> We should not define our happiness or our identity by our relationships with others. <<

True - but others will and they can't all be ignored.

But they can be educated.