h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

When hanging a new toilet roll on a holder, do you place it so the paper goes over (hanging down over the roll towards you, out from the wall) or under (hanging near the wall)?

Over - if I can be bothered. Mostly just balancing on the cistern.

Hanging near the wall. It's easier to tear off. Most men I know who have expressed a preference (two) say its easier the other way round. I didn't ask them just for this, the subject has just come up. What exciting conversations I have sometimes.

No contest... hanging over away from the wall.

Hooloovoo

This is quite straight forward. Annoyingly tidy people like the loose end next to the wall where it's difficult to get hold of, but it's tidy. Practical people prefer it the other way, for easy access.

I once received a joke email that discussed the parallels between toilet tissue use and overall personality. It divided people into four groups, defined by how they chose to roll their paper, and whether they chose to fold it or wad it up. I qualified as an "overroller, underscruncher". This was interpreted to mean that I am an incredibly orderly and neat person, near to the point of obsession. Clearly, the writer had never seen my apartment.

Used to take no notice at all until my wife complained that I always undered. Now I can't get used to undering any more and always over.

Where else in the world could this discussion happen?

Following on from the Colonel's point there about scruncher/folders, another dimension is the sitter/stander (that's taken at the point that they wipe their a**e) Put me down as a folder/sitter!

As to over/under rolling I find it best to leave putting the roll on the spindly thing to someone else. Of course this can lead to the most annoying of things which is when it then falls off the top of the toilet roll holder and lands in the water!!

This is far more complicated than I ever imagined.

Over - but i'm not entirely sure why i've always done it like that!

But do you use a Pap Baffle(A piece of toilet paper dropped in the pan before Dresden)?

Over/under - so long as there's enough on a roll to complete the task at hand, who cares?

I suspect people who worry about such things never actually visit the lavatory due to a problem with anal retention.

The "I can't believe no one has invented this" moment: Cistern lids with a sticky up bit to stick the toilet roll on and thereby stop it dropping into the water...

The invention process for something like this is quite simple.

The conversation runs something like this:

"Y'know what they say - a sucker is born every minute..."
"Yep, and they're gonna take a dump sooner or later."

What next? Two types of toilet tissue? One for overs, one for unders? Little electronic tags that sound an alarm if the bog roll is installed incorrectly? (© Mustapha Enterprises 2001)

Peregrin, you must have been ~really~ bored, or suffering from insomnia again...
I instal overs.
And I can't "leave it for someone else" as I am the only adult in the house.
The seat always gets left down...
One man I used to live with had the very annoying habit of flushing the toilet ~before~ he used it.
Then tried to flush it again, after he had finished, but before the cistern had had a chance to refil properly.
So he'd carry on trying to flush the empty cistern.
Made me want to scream.

I'm an over, my wife an under (I feel like Jack Sprat sometimes).

On a related topic: we did out our bathroom and ensuite a few months ago. In the ensuite ("her" bathroom), she chose one of those holders you have to unscrew, dismantle, and use 3 sizes of spanner to reassemble; in the main ("mine"), I chose one that's just an arm with an open end, which she complained looked "untidy".
Result: in my bathroom, the roll is on the holder 95% of the time. In hers, it's as likely to be on the window sill, cistern, or perched on top of the empty roll in the holder.
I ask you: whose room looks more untidy now?


Oh, and AGB - your ex must have been "flush-racing", where you see how early in the process you dare flush and still hope to beat it to the finish. Great fun - but only for number ones!

Under is the best way if you want to be able to take the toilet paper with one hand only. You can press the back of your hand against the roll to prevent it from turning as you tear off the required amount of paper. This is a must if you are changing a baby's nappy on the bathroom floor.

Where else could this conversation occur? In that other great British institution, the New Scientist magazine. There was a long discussion about this a few years back.

No, GVI, I think he was just doing it to annoy me.
It's not like my toilet bowl is filthy...unlike HIS, at his flat. And he never flushed his own toilet twice!
He is a Virgo though, maybe that had something to do with it.

Wow; I thought I was the only 'under' person! It's good to know there are more of us out there!

I don't know any other 'under' people at all.

I read recently that an American brand of toilet roll that was introduced to the UK not long ago had to be reformulated to make it less strong for the UK market. Apparently this was due to two factors - firstly, the standard British toilet has a weaker flush then those in the US, and secondly, the British tend to fold, whereas the Americans prefer to scrunch. It was not explained how they knew this. Perhaps they are watching now.

I gather that the Japanese have the coolest toilets, they have little fountains and hot air driers that come out of the back of the bowl at the push of a button and give you an automated wash - solves all these problems. They also have white noise generators to mask all those embarrassing sounds. They seem to have thought of everything.

Personally, I'm a seated over folder. It's nice to have a sense of identity.