h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Suddenly, the air around Hjik seems to distort and as if snapping out of slow motion, he suddenly flies from where he was standing and into the wall, his sword clattering to the floor in his wake.*

You almost made a very bad mistake, the swords were switched!

*HDS motions at the swords laying on the ground, then points at the two severely bloodied combtants, with a start, the swords lumber into the air, and ponderously switch places.*

There you go.

oocooc

*Hjik is severly bloodied, but him crashing into the wall must have hurt him much more severely than anyone could have anticipated. He doesn't get up from him position slumped against the wall. He doesn't move at all, externally or internally, his has ceased to breathe and his heart has ceased to beat. With no soul to reinforce his life force, his mortal coil was easily shed*

ooc2ooc2

*Jade rolls very ungracefully to her knees and bends her head down, and begins violently coughing. When she is finished there is a slight red sheen on the floor. She wipes her mouth and stands, only to wobble on weakened knees and fall again to the floor once again, her hair splayed our around her.*

*strained, sarcastically*

...At the expense of being made severe... amounts of fun of... Medic...? ...Mage...?

*She falls unconcious*

*Jade lies there unconscience, Hjik lays there apparently dead, and both are a bloody mess, its sort of like the movie the Resevoir dogs without all the humorous shooting*

*Goes to check Jade*

*goes to burry the apparently useless body of hjik*
any objections

Hjik, I could ask Namo to free your sould from the Halls of Mandos, thus leaving you a free spirit in the physical world, from there you could inhabit a clone body Would you like that?

*while waiting for Hjik's responce, HDS floats over to Jade, slides a Goa'uld healing device onto his hand and begins to slowly wave it over Jade, causing her to heal much more rapidly than she would normally have.*

Um HDS i think his soul is not in the halls of wherever i think itz in that shiny knife over there

*It is apparent that her body is healing, but she nonetheless (very resolutely) stays unconcious*

Well, in that case...

*HDS gestures with his free hand, a blue portal appears in the room, he gestures at the sword, it leaps into the air and flies into the portal, the portal closes.*

could you please get the spirit out of that little trinket and send it back to the mortal plain to find a body to inhabit?

Sure

That should solve that, not, back to her...

*HDS continues to heal Jade, eventually finishing*

How 'bout a drink Jade? I dare say we could all use at least three.

In "That should solve that, not, back to her...", "not" should have been "now".

*her eyes flutter open*

...A drink...? *touches her head with her hand* Ow...

*looks around, her eyes settle on Hjik*

Oh hell... I've won, haven't I...?

*She pushes herself upright and holds her head in her hands*

Will he be all right...?

um this bodies useless but hjik will come back.....i think

*Craxus emerges from the shadows.*

Oooo, blood all over the place and no , my favourite!

Aries... Dude. I'm still dead. See here I am, lying on the floor. Oh wait, I;'ve gotten up... But that's beside the point!

*indicates the dead body on the other end of the room with an apparently careless sweep of her left hand*

Body. Dead. Still need to clean up blood off floor. (heh heh)

Right, I'm going to pass out again. *does so*

*Pulls out mop and starts cleaning up blood*

oocooc

We ought to at least take your body somewhere to be burned... (ceremonially) I could make another room. Would you like me to?

*Wakes up.*

Oh, lord. Another Evangelion-esque ending...