h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

There are about 20 marble pillars lining the walls, a cheerful fire burning in a fireplace between each one. There is a large circular table fulling the hall with gold plates, utensils, chalices, and the like sitting on the stainless white linen. The back wall and ceiling are inchanted to be see through and the banner of the house of Gil-Galad hangs behind the farthest chair. All of the chairs are heavily polished mohogany, encrusted with gold and silver. Tell the plate what food you want and it will be there, tell the chalice what drink you want it will be there, and it will keep coming until you infor the plate or chalice that you have had your fill and they will be emptied and cleaned, it is magic!

Enjoy the food and drink!

, huh? So I have two dining rooms now, do I... Well all right then. Have fun.

sure, that way if you ever have a big party, there is twice as much space, food, drink and what not. Or if you want a change of pace from one dining room then there is another.

*HDS, looking like Professor Dumbledore at the end of the Harry Potter's first year at Hogwarts, gesturing at a plate next to him with his mohogony wand, a on his face.*

want some food or some ?

Oh, I don't drink darling, not usually anyway. Have you any pumpkin juice...?

Oh, and do you collect famous witches and wizards cards? I'll trade you... card 47, Edgar Stroulger... for say, card... 76. Merton Wagtail (Then I'll have all o the members of the Weird Sistersinn my collection. He he he heeeee...).

Just say pumpkin juice please to the cup and you shall recieve.

*HDS's wand shoots into his hand from within his robe's sleeve. He waves it and points it at a chair and summons his card case to him. The case comes flying from under his bed in cabin next door and sits itself gently on the seat. HDS opens it and begins to shift through the cleat pages. He comes to one and draws out the card that Jade requested, flips it in the air and does the un-summoning charm on it, so it flies to Jade and lands on her next to her plate.*

There you go.

Sweet! *hands him the card (whichever it was... I can't remember* that she said she'd trade for it*

Right on! Now my Weird Sisters colleciton is completed...! muahahahahahah...

*to the cup* Pumkin juice, please.

*the cup fills and Jade takes a sip*

Mmmm, just like mum used to make...

I'm glad you enjoy the pumpkin juice and like the card. I am a collector of many collectibles. Lots of stuff do I have in collection. Star Wars CCG cards, before they were discontinuied. all manner of things.

*she snaps her fingers and "The Real Flok Blues" by Mai Yamane starts playing out of nowhere in particular, but at a comfortable volume*

So, tell me Lews. Why are you so worried about me and my apparent womanhood...?

*sips at her pumpkin juice*

*sits down at the table and begins to sip from a glass of fine Austrian sherry*

Ah, pleasant converstaion is quite a joy! I was not worried about your womanhood, just apprehensive as always is the case when FoA is around beautiful women.

*HDS's chair spins around, revealing that he looks like Dumbledore in his end of year garb for the First year that Harry Potter spent at Hogwarts. Swirling the wine in his chalice.*

Excellent choice of music this evening Jade.

*slips into her (somewhat archaic) elf mode of speaking*

How know you then, that I am beautiful...?

*looks at HDS and grin*

I rather thought so, yes.

*once agian turns her attention to Lews*

How do you know this to be true? For you seem quite certain. It may be that I am naught but an old hag, with bits of twig and dust in my greying hair, decay'd teeth and so on and suchforth (if that wasn't a word before, it certainly is now.).

Are you so certain that I am an wlvish maiden, fair and green eyed, with meganta streaks running liken to the river Isen in my flaxen hair?

*grins*

You claimed so, Jade, in a post, and I, naively or not, took it for truth. This room is quite wonderful HDS.

*changes customary Istari robe and cloak for an exquisitly tailored Armani suit of black that only brings the paleness of Lews' features into greater exageration. Lews is a tall man of dishwater blond hair, clean shaven face (unlike most Istari and their magnificent beards) and rather thin. Conjures some Filet Mignon and begins to carve his meal*

Did Myst get the books yet?

Saddly no, I shall have them to him on Wednesday I do believe.

Ah, that last comment was only in jest, anyway.

*she grins* I am fair, it is said. (Ask Craxus, I assume he still has a particularly grainy, however slightly decent picture of me in jedi garb...)

Either way, if this is to be a formal type occasion, I suppose I ought to change into something a bit more appropriate...

*She snaps her fingers and suddenly is wearing a long pale blue dress. (which is made of silk, or something rather like it, for the way it flows about when Jade moves.) It fits tightly to Jade's small frame, but not so much that she cannot move. On it are embroidered patterns of vines and leaves of Lorien in light green and metalic thread. her hair is piled high atop her head, most of it in small beaded braids, but a large majority of it cascading down her back, near to her waist. Her hair is golder blonde, with intermittent streaks of bright magenta. On her brow is a modest silver circlet, set with small shining gems. She wears a delicate chain mail gauntlet on her right hand. It is inlaid with light blue stones.*

*She settles herself in her seat once more, looking quite pleased with the results, and slightly surprised that her gauntlet has materialised.*

Anyway. where were we then, gentlemen...?

I believe we were discussing FoA, but the subject seems slightly innapropriate to the atmosphere. From what family do you derive your elven beauty fair lady?

Not so much family, dear sir, but which branch, as it were.

*she blushes slightly*

Embarassed though I am to say it, I am a decendant of the Avari; the elves who did not answer the call of the Valar so long ago... My people have taken to the trees, or dwell near rivers.

*she thinks for a moment*

I believe you might call me a wood elf, for it is long since the cal of the Valar arose, and I dwelled long both the the forests of Mirkwood and Lorien.

*realises that she said "the" twice, sighs, taps her fingernails on the tabletop somewhat impatiently*

So...! How about those Uruk-hai...?

Oh, and just because I'm curious, that FoA bloke. You say girls are always around him? Don't they get at all turned off by how forward he is...? (Gods know I might...)

Most do get turned off by him, but a few do their best to see past the wild and horny exterior to see the truly good guy that lies within (still wrestles with the truth of knowing FoA as a good guy). But even the large percentage of the turned off just can't seem to get away from him, he has the insidious ability to be exactly where you are when you least expect him!

Really now...?
*she grins and takes a sip of her pumpkin juice*

...well then I wonder why he hasn't seemed to find this conversation as yet...