h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*unable to restrain herself any longer, hurls self at AMCJ and starts attacking him with fists*

*her punches hurt a lot more than Carmel 's*

*Jolted from a sound sleep by GL's six guns, Witty yelps.*

'elp! What was that?

*She surveys the scene and grabs her gun and aims it at AMCJ.*

Don't move a muscle, mister.

Titania! Leave him be for a moment and fire some of your arrows at that escaping indian!

And Witty! A little hot water wouldn't hurt either.

*Continues firing at Running Jello*

[Yeah! And try not to hit X!]

*reluctanly stops pumelling AMCJ*

*hastily grabs bow and arrow, aiming carefully*

Twinnnng!!!

AMCJ, there is a large frying pan aimed at the back of your head. I repeat, don't move a muscle.

*Witty gets a clean view, aims at Running Jello and fires a stream of hot water at him. She immediately returns her aim to AMCJ without seeing if her shot hit its target.*

*Gives AMCJ The Look.*

Ladies ! Ladies ! Please restrain yourselves . It is most disconcerting being pummeled without the benefit of a drop of wine.

What is the commotion all about ?

Miss Witty woul dthere be anything to eat in that frying pan of yours what !

*As Running Jello runs, a bullet catches him in one shoulder and another in the back. He rapidly draws in his breath and inadvertently sucks in the piece of steak he was chewing and begins to choke. The stumbles over a rattlesnake that turns and strikes him on one ankle, just as a stream of hot water disolves his other leg. As he topples over the edge of a small cliff, and elf arrow embeds itself in his backside and begins to burn with a green flame. He falls over the cliff, onto the top of a narrow cactus, which goes right through him and hits bottom, breaking his neck. Several startled scorpions sting his innert body. His head lands on a sun-heated rock and starts to melt.*

*Runs over and looks over the cliff.*

I think he's dead.

Mister, shut your mouth, or the next thing you eat will be that bowler of yours.

*Calls over her shoulder to the others*

Did we get the other one?

*snorts*

What a magnificent way to go! You don't see that kind of performance often nowadays... :'-)

*turns around and glares at AMCJ*

~meanwhile, in a cave some distance away~

*Dances with Jello hears a wet thud from one of the cave entrances and the faint sound of disturbed and angry scorpions*

I wonder what that was ?

*A sneaky look comes into Dances eyes ...... a moment later he tosses the Pug to Jello Wolf and leaps at Billy the Kid*

RUN CHIEF !

Well, you have to admit that Running Jello went out with some style.

As for you......*turning to AMCJ*

You may sound like a gentleman but you most definitely aren't, taking advantage of a kind gesture like that.

If you want Merlot, mate, you'll have to go for it!

*Catches the pug, turns and runs into the depths of the cave.*

Just had a power failure due to 100° F temps here in New Jersey. It may happen again, so I may be in and out of the action today.


We need this so-called gentlement to trade for the pug. We need at least 2 people guarding him at all times. I volunteer for the first shift.

*rides in on Bonnie's head struggling to eat a large portion of backlog cheesecake* overhears Witty*

They've taken BeeBee?! I'll take first shift watching the prisoner. I can't take off now I've eaten all of this cheesecake.

*takes for pistols out of their holsters simultaneously and points them at the weird apparition in the squashed bowler hat*

That would be four (4) pistols.