h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I want to know how they built this entire complex in seven days, not least while they were supposed to be at war.

Immigrant workers. The Poles were done, dusted and had moved on to putting up a few Daily Mail readers' conservatories by the time the Doctor turned up.

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I must have missed that bit - can anyone remind me?

This was my least favourite episode so far, it was just ok I thought. Next week's looks good though.

Deb

They fell off Martha's stilettoed feet.

'Hell Hath no fury like a woman's corns.'

Sorry, I appear to be suffering from the heat.

They were another race and there had been a decision to launch a joint colonisation mission, when the Captain died they could not decide on a successor and started a war instead.

Jenny - the new Kadiatu Lethbridge-Stewart?

Have to say I was expecting the daughter to be his actual daughter, Susan's mum, and all that. Some past survivor of the Time War and everything.

did you know the actress is really Peter Davidson's daughter?

Probably why she got the job, she only had two facial expressions.

"I want to know how they built this entire complex in seven days, not least while they were supposed to be at war."

I'm pretty sure they built the complex in some longer period, then got into trouble and started a war that has lasted the 7 days since. Also, given some decent technology like replicators, or at least prefab components and construction machinery, with a detailed plan set out in advance, it might well only take a couple of weeks.

The war must have been going on longer than seven days unless the older soldier dude was created that old or already has alzheimers.

Or if he was part of the original crew that went to the planet?

I assumed that he was part of the original crew but, that being the case, he'd have known that he was talking bull crap.

Ah, I see, that was the point. He was a devious so-and-so.

I'd take it that the war had started 7 days ago, but that everything that'd been built had been built in the days leading up to 7 days ago. That make sense? So the most recently built stuff had been built a week ago. And the clones had such a short lifespan and were being created so quickly that they didn't live long and didn't realise the time scale.

The scar on the Doc's hnd after the DNA sample had been taken - did anyone else think that it looked really like the scar on the hand of the Empty Child?

The doctor mentioned that the clones age really quickly, so I don't think the general was actually that old.

Also, going by the dates, it had to have all been built in that time.

Just cos it was all built in seven days, why does that mean the war had only been going on for seven days too? Couldn't it have been built, then the war started and had been going on for quite a while? Was there anything to say that the last date stamp was today or yesterday or whatever?

Deb

The seven days comes from the gap between the last bit being built/the captain dying and the current date.

So assuming the war started shortly after the last section was finished then the war was seven days old.

FB

Sometimes I wish I didn't pick plot holes in everything.

yeah that's what I got too - the last bit was built 7 days ago, then the captain died and the war started.

Just watched it on BBC Three. Absolutely blimmin' TERRIBLE episode.

First off, it teased us all in the trailer last week by pretending that the Doctor had a kid he didn't know about and so having the whole "we suddenly made a sort-of clone" thing at the start felt like being cheated; although at least the episode started as it meant to go on. Half the things that happened in the story had no real purpose or reason other than to advance the plot. The creation of the daughter for example, had no real reasoning nor logic behind it. The imprisoning of said daughter even though she was loyal was nothing more than a plot device to make sure the doctor could win her to his side (which wouldn't have happened if she'd joined the other soldiers making the general's decision even more ridiculous). Martha's joining the Haath didn't really seem to serve any purpose other than to tell us they weren't evil monsters and to give us some excellent above-ground alien planet-ness (the highlight of the episode) and the Haath's death felt gratuitous and the unnecessary crowbarring-in of emotional drama. The whole "it's only been seven days" thing was a great revelation until you realised it made no sense whatsoever. So all those soldiers - all of them - none had lived longer than six days or so despite the "war" (ha!) not being terribly intense from what we saw? And the general - he looked like he'd been around longer than seven days given the cloning process created perfect physical specimens in their 20s.

The "war" was also a bit feeble. How big was this colony ship and how efficient were their birthing machines? Both sides seemed to have about twenty men (I was tutting at this all through - it was typical old-Who budgetry constraints trying to punch above its weight; if you've only got the money for a couple of squads fighting in some tunnels then script it as a couple of squads fighting in some tunnels dag nammit!).

Oh, and *that* ending. First off, it was clear something was going to happen to Dr Jr after the Doctor offered to take her on the TARDIS. Then, again without any good reason, the general shoots her (perhaps he was just bonkers, because he seemed to do a lot of things in the episode that MADE NO SENSE) to make sure she can't go. Then I sat there thinking "but she's a Timelord/lady, she'll regenerate" then the Dr says "Oh, no, she can't because she's too much like me" (?!) then they all leave and she DOES regenerate but because the actress had clearly been signed-up for the spin-off that they unsubtly plugged at the end she doesn't actually change.

Stupid, stupid, stupid. As a piece of drama and storytelling this failed miserably. The only positive is that next week's episode looks like it could be absolutely terrific.