h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*quickly thanks rimmer for the lovely flowers then takes one of her stileeto heels and pops minion, his insides exploding everywhere* and flb wherever you are, i don't drink tea!

Turd come here.
*Minion trips and falls down a large hill*
Argh, ouch, doh, stupid, dumb, idiot.

*He comes to rest in a field of flowers and mushrooms*
So pretty.
*Immediately he begins to eat everything in sight*.
Arrrghgfh.

*but they are gone...*
guess they wimped out...
*his ear falls off and runs away. the mp bunny catches it and eats it...*

*sneaks up behind the bunny and puts a sign on his back that reads 'kill me'*

*he then realizes he is in the head of huxley. her big secret was that she imagined him the whole time. she started all of this.*
wow this place is pretty empty...
*takes out his swiss army knife and walks to the eye*

*slaps bunny man in the face* WAKE UP< bunnyman! stiop trying to get in my head, you're much to big to go in my ear!

*the television in the back of fuzzy's mind cuts off...
everything goes quite...
what in the hell was he doing with a waitress asking him what he wanted for breakfast...
oh yeah, quantum leap...*

*the bunny disappears...replacing him is a small fuzzy bunny holding a rose, it must be in love...*

*thinking it may be the mp bunny, jr finds one of death dogs' discarded battle axes and chops the bunny into tiny pieces and begins to make rabbit stew*

*after eating a field of flowers and mushrooms minion stands up*
Where am I??
*looks around*
I am in a magical world.....Where the clouds are like marshmallows.
I think I am in Bunny's head???
No I take that back I am just high.
*minion begins to roll aroung on the ground and then pukes*

*minion recovers from his puking fit and struggles to his feet*
I wish I had some bunny stew.

Wait no I Want....

CHICKEN SALAD!!!!!!MMMMMMMmmmmm.
*then he hurls again*

*walking aimlessly through the wilderness minion sees some smoke off in the distance and proceeds to head towards the fire*

Home or Hell???

*minion walks right into the flames of her fire-breathing *

*as he draws near the fire minion draws his blazing broad sword from its sheath*

What sort of establishment is this??

*creeping closer he notices a group of women washing clothes in a creek*

Wow those are nice......

*the women unaware of their intruder continue to clean clothes in a boiling pot of water on the shore*

*the waitress refills his coffee. he sees minion approaching him holding his sword.*
what are you doing ?
*but he keeps walking towards the waitress staring at her chest*

*the mouse startling minion causes him to jump out of the bushes and suprise the women washers*

Don't worry I will slay this beast!!!

*turning he realizes it is a mouse and he steps on it crushing every little bone in its puny body including the ones that make up his little fur tail that would have been really cute if it could wag back and forth*

Sorry about that ladies.

*suprised by the events the women struggled to cloth themselves yet they seem at ease around the gargantuan beast before them*

*comforted the ladies gather there thing and invite the beast back to there village for food and rest*

*he follows with no idea where he is going*

and again...
*runs around in circles barking*

*once at the village minion notices that the entire village is made up of beautiful women, the apparent leader walks toward him*

Leader: Thank you for your help strong creature.
Minion: No problem, all in a days work
*minion remebers that not a few hours ago he had his butt kicked by a beaver*

Leader: Are you a MAGMA worrior??
Minion: Why yes, how interesting for you to have noticed.
*confused by her question, he slowly braces his broad sword*

Leader: We have to notice because we eat things like you for dinner
Minion: Oh, of course you do....

*watches in dissamy as minion kills the cook and the clerk in one fatel swoop. what is he doing? and why was he staring at the waitresses like that?*