h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*The Kid Loads up waiting for the fire works to begin.*

*the fire begins to work*

Not quite the same, but it'll keep us jolly warm in this awful weather!

*throws a couple of gypsies on the fire*

There, that should keep us going for a while.

Anyone for a snifter ?

*unloads blunder thingy puts it on the ground* I'll take one their Mate

*Disappointed by the lack of Bentley-drawn Beetles to blast with buckshot he unloads his Purdey and tosses the two cartridges into the fire*

That ought to wake up a few slumbering servants, wot?

*hands Kidders a large shot of Brandy from a hip flask*

Get your whiskers around this old boy.

should we be worried about having a bonfire indoors by the way chaps ?

Thanks Ole Chap * drops the shot down his gullet* Well now that you mention it Redders perhaps we should head outside it will warm up soon enough.

Likely to get bally hot outside as well old chap if the Club goes up ..... there's enough alcohol in the cellars to keep a blaze going for a year or three .... I mean the stash of Glen Wobble alone would lay waste to the entire Home Counties if a spark got in there !

Another snifter ?

Don't mind if I do.

I say, don't hog the brandy flask, chaps!

You know, I always felt the club house was getting a bit tatty. Wouldn't be such a bad thing to have to relocate.

We could even have it at my place. I've got a large basement and some modern automatic bar thingy.

If only I could remember the way home...

*hands Inkers a snorter of Brandy*

Basement old boy - isn't that a tad colonial ? Redderington Hall has a fine old cellar dontcherknow

cellar? Cellar? CELLAR? The only 'cellar' I can begin to even consider being seen within the vicinity of is celery salt, and only when accompanied by a shot of tomato juice, some worcestershire sauce, tabassco, pepper, horse raddish and a hearty slosh of vodka ... keep yer branflakes and yer fancy wotnot breakfasts ... eggs and bakes, a snorker or seven, mushrooms, black pudding, fried bread, tomatoes, and a good stiff bloody mary ... that's what breakfast's all about ...

Well Mates y'all know my taste. What taste if you gents like it I'll go with it. Sound like a good plan to me.

You Gents want to get some marshmellows. And it's getting a tad bit smoky in here.*gasp cough* I say lets Have a barn fire party for Halloween.

Hello there,

Just had to write in to commend you on your spiffy club and performance on the series: Lonely Planet - Six Degrees of Seperation! Most fabulous

While in Adelaide (South Australia) presently, I will be keeping a look out for the chaps when I commence (my soon to begin) working holiday adventure. Do hope to spot you gallavanting!

Anyway, really just wished to say that I was quite simply bedazzled and think that it is just grand that a club like yours exists. More men should wear hats I say!

*big claps* for your *again* stunning performance

tally pops!
Linda

P.s. Please forgive my feeble attempt to sport an accent!

*huh...wha...snort* Er...it appears there's somebody here. Did you speak, my dear?

We were just havin' a brief after dinner snooze dontcherknow. Nap seems to have gotten a bit out of hand, what? Turned into fullblown hibernation, by Jove. Went to roost in October and now be blowed if it isn't bally March already! Perfectly inconsiderate how time does go on, no reverent pause as a chapess takes her 40 winks. No sense of decorum and what's owin, what? P'on my word, that makes a chapess almost write to the Times, what, what!

Times? Is it out already? Did they publish my letter?
Woz to drink...is the McLurshers finished...

Blasted!! Don't know if she's finished er what, but the bloody bottle's turned a most unpleasant color of yellow...

*takes a whiff*

*outraged*

Yellow old boy ! Yellow !!!

I say. I mean what self-respecting Chap would entertain drinking anything so heathen as yellow. Quaffing fine liquids of an amber hue I might remind you sirrah is the mark of a gentleman and yellow quite obviously the mark of a knave

Who is responsible for this outrage ? I'm willing to wager it's that frightful old cove Fred Hogg ! Haven't seen him around since the great Glen Wobble forgery scandal last year dontcherknow. Come to think of it that also involved some vile yellow liquid didnt it ?

Now where's that splendid Australian filly gorn orf to ? Wuff wuff