h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm still voteing for Jim Henson.

[Dylan] I like samitches.

[Maggie] [Dylan's sister] I like swords.

Peanut butter samitches?

Okay, the final vote results are in: Wile E. Coyote manages to catch a clone of Big Bird and eat it, while the real Big Bird escapes. Sylvester has fallen into a dog pound, and is never seen again.

An entirely predictable outcome if I may venture an opinion. Shameabout Sylvester but never could stand a Cat with a thspeech impediment .

Now what about Foghorn Leghorn and Yosemite Sam ? Hmmm .... Cartoon Wars - there`s an idea ?

[The "Star Wars" themesong begins, and the words "Cartoon Wars" fly away from the screen. The following flies up from the bottom of the screen into the background.]

EPISODE II
THE WESTERNERS

Ever since Big Bird defeated Sylvester and Wile E. Coyote, peace has been in the world of Warner Bros. But it was not to last. Now, Yosemite Sam and Foghorn Leghorn must battle to see who is the greatest ...

[Cut to a desert scene. Yosemite Sam and Foghorn Leghorn are facing each other. Westerner music is in the background. Yosemite Sam draws his pistols, and Foghorn -- Hey, wait a minute! Where'd that gunblade come from??]

[Foghorn Leghorn] Now I say now I say now, I heard we was gonna fight, so I came prepared!

[Look, Buster, you were only supposed to use what you usually do, not something stolen from FF8!]

[Leghorn] Aww ...

[He jams the gunblade into the rocks. Squall walks onscreen, grabs the gunblade with a miffed look on his face, and exits.]

but wouldnt you like to see big bird in purple boots and suspenders like all the best wrestlers? and a mask? thats what im getting at!

BOOKMARK

[Squall] Well at least it's something.

[YK] When did you come in here?

[Dylan] When did BOTH of you come in here!?

[YK] Nothing!

[YK leaps into the air and crashes through the ceiling. (Yes, Mr. Director, you did read that right: he jumped up from sitting in a courtroom and crashed into the CEILING and added a fortune to the budget.) Squall watches him go.]

[Squall] Is he always like that?

[Dylan] No. Sometimes he starts acting silly.

[Squall] Whatever.

*Notices that KL has started playing Jacks*

hey! what's wrong with a thspeach impediment?!

Nothing that I can tell. Unless you're trying to say a tongue twister, in which case it merely makes the challenge different as opposed to more challenging. That's how I'd see it, anyway.

[Squall] Whatever.

it would make it all better if arl were to return...

And better still if the Masque returned.

Okay, I finished the last Hornblower novel and am on to the next one (Hornblower and the Atropos). The last one was quite good, actually.

(Angry at his own ambivilence)

[Dylan] Bebbies.

[Squall] .....