h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Agent gathers an army of kug-fu trained sheep and as one they charge CCC. The magnificent stones reverberate with the awesome din as the sheep thunder over CCC, until all that can be seen is a mass of wool and the odd glimpse of dented chrome*

You know, he's not nearly as tough as he makes out.

*the bits of chrome melt and meld together and the reform back into the shape of CCC*

you were saying?

*CCC grabs one of the as they pass and stuffs Agent's head up it's bottom*

It's remarkably roomy in here

*Agent huffs and he puffs and he fires the sheep off his head staight into CCC's visor, blinding him momentarily. Agent runs quickly up to CCC and spins him rapidly 5 times clockwise before shoving him down the hill towards a bath of acid which miraculously appeards*

*As CCC staggers, trips and falls into the acid, his screams echo round the stones while Agent miolks his sheep*

*CCC stands up and the acid drips off*

I'm specially coated to withstand acid. that's how i defeated Duck and Deakie in the first place .

*the sheep Agent is milking suddenly ticks and explodes, leaving just a burnt stool leg and some wool*

*Agent materialises high in the ionosphere , quaffs the milk and suddenly begins to glow with an eerie aura*

I cannot be defeated, I am invincible

*As his voice booms around the ancient stones, he hurtles downwards towards CCC, gaining momentum as the rushes towards him. As a sonic boom reverberates through the air, Agent collides with CCC and drives him down through the earth into the molten magma*

*CCC's armour melts and soon the smell of charred flesh can be smelt from miles away, as Agent erupts triumphantly from the earth*

chromecoveredclones, eh? What a feeble race of misfits

<>

Ahem? Who was it we left crawling on his knees picking up bits of fluff and mess? That'd be you in your great defeat I think!

*pulls out the ultimate weapon - The Mothers Finger - and waggles it at CCC while grabbing his ear with the other hand and smacking his bippy with the other and wiping his snivelling nose with the other hand*

*wriggles free of Deakie*

when i said defeated you i meant it was a draw!

thanks for getting me out of the lava tho!

*feeds Agent into a sausage machine, making 15 sausages, cooks them on a stick over the crater leading to the center of the earth and feeds them to the sheep.*

*grabs CCC again*

And did you ever know anyone who wiggled away from The Mothers Finger? I think not, young man. Now get to your bed early!

*goes to bed early*

*The little sheep droppings suddenly start to roll together, coalescing to become Agent, who feels ever more powerful for going through some sheep*

Right, you little - hang on, where'd he go? Off to bed you say? I knew he couldn't handle playing with the big Gods.

that deaks will spank my bippy if i get out of bed.

*clicks his fingers and disappears*

*reapperas moments later in his cheerleading outfit (again)*

Go Deakie, Waggle that finger, Go Deakie

*grabs Agent in yet another hand, gives his bippy a smack and sends him off to clear up the ruddy mess those darn have made*

If you can't look after your pets then we'll have to give them to the SSPCA who will find them responsible owners!

*winks at Ferret when the other two can't see*

*Agent s the mess away, and goes and sits serenely in the middle of the stones in a state of *

Right, now that you've cleaned up, you can go to bed early with no supper too for fighting with CCC!

And take those with you! They're carping all over the paths!

*starts cheering* Wooo!

Deakie, Deakie!

*thinks ferret's phone call was to Deakie*

Oi You, did I not just send you to bed?


Thought so................................!

it's true then!

*escapes out of the window, after stuffing the bed with pillows, so it looks like i'm still there*