h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

C'mon. I know that I care about every voter who has declared his or her intention to vote for my good friend Hypatia. A5645531.

Maybe you're not used to this positive, free-spirited campaign. I urge you to hop aboard. Naturally, I cann't offer you anything other than some and a promise that Hypatia will be the best President h2g2 will ever see

Surely the noble cause is more important than wooing?

What sort of ?

Every sort of

Except Broccoli.
And they're clearly labelled so you don't end up eating, I don't know, vomit cake when you thought it was carrot cake

Yep - two s. Twice as much And all you have to do is put the X beside Reddyfreddy's name.

I don't know if you realized, but I offered *every* kind of That's much more than 2 s.

PRESS RELEASE-
ReddyFreddy campaign: '2 is more than infinity.'
Vote Hypatia. She knows how to add and stuff like that.

*rats*

Wholly unrealistic promises - 2 s is deliverable, without putting a vast extra strain on the tax burden, which your party would *have* to do.

Ever hear of Little Debbie? Inexpensive, delicious cake, headquartered in Tennessee, which is not far from... the Ozarks.

We will abolish the tax.

Abolish the tax? You see, it's rash fiscal promises of that sort that will drive all the sensible voters our way. Only the bewildered and helplessly silly would fall for a ...

Ah. Right. You've really thought this one through, haven't you?

Are you open to the idea of being headhunted for our campaign at all?

?

I'm open to making ReddyFreddy one of Hypatia's minions, and nothing less

Well, maybe a cushy campaign job and a cabinet post. Rally around the !

I don't like the sound of minions!

Well, of course you'd get a high paying job on the Committee to Elect Hypatia and a cushy position in any department if you convince your candidate...

Bagpuss, I'm prepared to offer you all of the above, the cake AND a mystery

Vote the unoruptable vote 2legs (and recieve all kinds of bribes and sexual favours)

Sounds good until you consider all the badgers involved

Dubious offers from 2legs aside, please keep on bidding. This is exactly the sort of behaviour I was hoping to encourage.

How would you like to be Vice Vice President?

Hmmm, what does the job entail? I hope the word 'cushy' appears in the description.

Absolutely.
Lord knows I, the Vice Presidential nominee, don't do any work. Why would my Vice Vice President do any work? Just doesn't make any sense to me.

And looking at the job description, it appears that your obligation is to-
1- Have a pulse.
2- Indulge
3- Vote for Hyp and campaign for her when you have the time.


Personally, the first one seems hardest. Especially when the second one might be in competition with it

I'll think about it.

?