h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Lady of Shalott]

I'm thinking (again, 3 times in one day!) that maybe our original quest is a little too big a challenge for us. I'm thinking that maybe we should quest to join the procrastinators society instead. Tomorrow of course.

I suppose we should spend another night in the hovel as it looks like rain.

(Sir Knight)

Good idea..

*They head into the Hovel (not the Dwarfs or hourses/cammel obviously)..

[Lady of Shalott]

It's a good thing we left the horses/camel and dwarves out side or the moderators would be overloaded with work. By the way, have you seen our travelling companion and map reader recently? Last I saw of him was in the river. I hope the goldfish didn't get him.

Don't worry. I'm still here. Do you think i would leave the group? I was just out cold for two days (my computer is at w**k). But I am here.

(Sir Knight)

I am just going for a morning, opps; afternoon swim, back in a moment...

*The Knight goes for a swim, but finds something in the stream*

Look::
I have found a odd shaped stone with some inscription on, shall I read it?

here goes;

Been here before a long time ago
But this time I wear no sandals
Ages past I gave all you people
Food and water

Three feet tall so very small I'm no trouble
I bring thunder lightning sun and the rain
For all the people in the land

A message of love
I bring you from up above
All good children gather around
Come join your hands and sing along

They call me mad the swine
I guess I'm mad the swine
I've come to save you save you
Mad the swine
Mad the swine
So all you people gather around
Hold out your hands and praise the Lord

I walk upon the water just as before
I'll help the meek and the mild and believers and the blind
And all the creatures great and small
Let me take you to the river without a ford?fall
Oh and then one day you realise
You're all the same within His eyes
All I've come to say just like before


Hmmmm::
Wonder if it is a clue....

*Knight gets out of stream and dresses, enters the Hovel*

[Lady of Shalott]

That was a big one, stone I mean. A big stone that you found in the river.

(Sir Knight)

Yes

*Struggling to remove stone/boulder from stream bed*

Oh, opps::

It wasn't a stone::
Rather it was::
But it was also a plug::
All the water is draiiiiiinging from the streeeeeeeeeeeeem!

And look::
Something is written on the other side as well


[wonder where the water draiiiiiiiiins too?]

[Lady of Shalott]

I can't quite make out what the inscription says, I think it is runic. Oh, no, you're just holding it upside down. That's it, if I just rub some of the riverbed mud off of it I can read it clearly.

It says: Other way up.

I guess you're right it's probably a clue.

I'm sure the water has just gone to the sea or something and taken those horrible gold with it.

Gold ? Where? (don't mind me)

(Sir Knight)

Who the heck is that that just poped up through the plug-hole?

Yeah, probably the sea, but maybe, no, if I move this stone, and it reveals, just behind this lever::

No, only kidding....


(Dwarfs 1-11)

At last, we can breath again, now all that water has gone.....

[Lady of Shalott]

So, what do you suppose the ancient script scored onto the large stone plug might mean?

(Dorctor who)

Oh; wron thread!!!!

(Sir Knight)

Maybe Voltear will know, thats his department, although maybe it is suggesting we, no haven't got a clue (Mornington)

I shall try and think....

(Sandra the Hairdressor (retired)).

Anyone know the way to the retirement home for hairdressers.


(Sir Knight)

What, who, where, where did you come from?

*Turns quickly*

(Dwarf 11)

Watch what you are doing, you just poked me in the eye!!!

(Sir Knight)

Damm; sorry, guess we should not walk around with no clothes on, you dwarfs are just the wrong height.....

(Sandra)

Ahhhhh::

You are all naked!!!

These ancient scripts are new to me although i do recognize some of the symbols. This one (points to mountain-looking symbol) is a diagram of the mountains just west of here followed by what seems to be a map showing a secret entrance.

[Freud]

Ah, I see zee problem. When you take into account the Oedipus and Electra complexes, penis envy and the fact that you are all stuck in de anal stage, it all makes perfect sense. You are all barking mad.

(Sir Knight)

But even I could read the words, but could not disphier their (pressumbably) hidden message::
Something about a Mad Swine, 3 Ft tall....

Its all written up there...

[Lady of Shalott]

Hang on a moment, I think I'm having a psychic revelation...

This is the way I always dreamed it would be
The way that it is,o-oh,when you are holding me
I never had a love of my own
Maybe that's why when we're all alone
I can hear music
I can hear music

Do you think the 2 messages tie in? Where's Voltear when you need an acedamic?

(Sir Knight)
look there is another message written on the side of the stone!


'In the year of thirty-nine'
Assembled here the volunteers
In the days when lands were few
Here the ship sailed out into the blue and sunny morn
The sweetest sight ever seen
And the night followed day
And the story tellers say
That the score brave souls inside
For many a lonely day
Sailed across the milky seas
Never looked back never feared never cried

Don't you hear my call
Though you're many years away
Don't you hear me calling you
Write your letters in the sand
For the day I'll take your hand
In the land that our grand-children knew

'In the year of thirty-nine'
Came a ship from the blue
The volunteers came home that day
And they bring good news
Of a world so newly born
Though their hearts so heavily weigh
For the earth is old and grey
Little darlin' we'll away
But my love this cannot be
Oh so many years have gone
Though I'm older than a year
Your mothers eyes from your eyes cry to me

Don't you hear my call
Though you're many years away
Don't you hear me calling you
Write your letters in the sand
For the day I'll take your hand
In the land that our grand-children knew

Don't you hear my call
Though you're many years away
Don't you hear me calling you
All your letters in the sand
Cannot heal me like your hand
For my life still ahead pity me

[Lady of Shalott]

*drifts off into her future delusion - I love that song, like the live version on Live Killers too with Freddie singing*

Oh! I keep drifting off into strange psychic trances. Maybe I should see a physician.

(Sir Knight)

One of my Favourate songs as well**

What were we doing?

[Lady of Shalott]

Erm, where were we? Oh, yes. I think we had started to lose the rather flimsy plot again.

Where have the dwarves gone? I fancy some music.