h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

HAHAHAHAHA!

voice: pinned to the ceiling, our heros have seemingly no hope. A veritable arsenal of painful things are speeding towards them, and they are powerless. Or are they?

[YK] No, we're not!

[YK throws his lightsaber "upwards" and uses the Force to deflect everything except for one bullet which hits three-eighths of an inch above his head]

[YK] D'HAAAAA!

* the penguin creates an inpenetrable barrier that protects the heroes from the onslaught, but can do nothing about the gravity *

[Penguin] Ouch! I wish I hadn't left my mobile phone at home. Then I could call the emergency rescue service the Ministry run. Oh well. It's not like I know the number anyway.

[[Diamond Light]]

[YK summons Carbuncle, who casts Reflect2 on all Good Guys. Reflect2 reflects anything that hits it to the opponents of the person with Reflect2. It is impervious to anything except stuff that's already been reflected. YK's lightsaber does /not/ fall because the Force works independently of gravity. However, it /does/ fall behind YK's Reflect2 shield because thermite and lightsabers do not get along well.]

*GL waits outside the door for the commotion to die down. Debris flys through the hole in the door and destroys some of the equipment in the Outer Defense System Room. Suddenly, the flying debris stops. GL peeks around the edge of the hole and sees two shields protecting the heroes. This is the moment he has been waiting for. GL enters and is pinned to the door.*

Hey! Who turned up the gravity?

[Everyone Else] YOWUZUPMAN!

[[Ultima]]

[The room shakes. A blue glow fills the area. A wave of pure energy smashes into all villains present.]

[Yo's Helmet Computer: Jane] Armor integrity: outer layer, has fallen 23%, Critical Damage to Camofluage system, cooling system now engaging.

[[Float]]

[Mog casts "Float" on all the Good Guys, making them impervious to gravity. Er, did that soudn right?]

[Mog] It worked!

[YK] That was cool. Now should I summon Alexander to deal with the grav system, or Bahamut ZERO?

[Penguin] No need, I think I know how to do it.

* he puts a lightning bolt through the gravity controller in the hope that it will reset to default, and that the defaults are vaguely sensible *

[The gravity generator breaks entirely. Everyone starts floating]

[YK] Whoa! This is more fun than using the Force to levitate!

[Correction: The heroes /continue/ to float, and everything else /starts/ to float. By the way, the Reflect2 will wear off in about three posts, not counting this one.]

*UH drifts towards the lt,deflecting bullets with his claws*

[The lasers bounce off the Reflect2 and hit the Lt.]

[[Diamond Dust]]

[YK summons Shiva, who blasts the fire with ice. The two cancel each other out, and Shiva disappears.]

[Yo] Jane, arm the mines.

[Jane] ...done

~sends a transmission~

* the penguin floats over towards Yowzupman, gun in hand, and fires. The recoil sends him careening into the ceiling *

[Penguin] Ow!

[YK] D'HAAA! Yo, if it was Zelda you'd hit with that thing, you'd be doomed!

[By now, the Reflect2 shields have worn off]