h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They say, in canyons,
You can lead a burro to
Water and splash them

Next: Dorothy Parker, grass, and

Dorothy Parker
is not known to me but I
enjoy grass and tea

next: end every line of the haiku with the letter x

When playing the sax
It sounds like soft dripping wax
Reminds me of sex
Next topics; Day in the life of a sax player involving the word chair.

she blew the sax for
money it was a living
she was not cheerful (chairful your get the idea)

full contact haiku time: alliterate a haiku

she blew the sax for
money it was a living
she was not cheerful (chairful you get the idea)

full contact haiku time: alliterate a haiku

Dorothy P. drank
and dozed, dreamt and divined, drank,
drolly danced, then died.

Next topics: ocean cruises, sea spray, and obnoxious dowagers

nice one - except drolly - did you make that word up?

De Wages were poor
On the ocean cruise but
sea spray was cool

next - a very british word - tottie - a generic word meaning quality members of the opposite sez

Tottie I can spy
I wonder over, say "hi"
Legs for which to die!

Next topic:
A Haiku on Pizza eating Bobby.

Bobby deserved to
be eat by the pizza he
was a b*****d


Next: cankerous (coroding - from the Oxford English Dictionary)

<"Drolly" would mean "in a droll fashion">

Oh, cankerous tooth,
bearer of throbbing pain, cease
to disquiet me!

Next topic: Fresh, cool air after a thunderstorm

You are fresh and cool
for giving me drolly but
thunderstorm is bad

Next - Howay the lads - Northeast England - The cheer to encourage the local football(soccer that is).

You are fresh and cool
for giving me drolly but
thunderstorm is bad

Next - Howay the lads - Northeast England - The cheer to encourage the local football team(soccer that is).

It is still unknown
they attend soccer games and
Cry "Howey the lads"

Next Phrase: Twitched - The verb form of the heebie-jeebies

Face twitching, eyes wide,
he stalks dark halls. "Ghosts, begone!"
He cries. Sheets flap. "BOO!"

Next topics: Door number one, blond contestant,
and

The blond contestant
Tries to push the door
A door that says PULL

Next: Blond joke involving water

I DO know jokes 'bout
"Blondes" and "water" but they're too
naughty for this board!

Next: sunshine, a cold beer and the distressing sound of mobile phones ringng

At the sunny shore,
I sip my beer and curse them,
Those cell-phone users!

Next: Flight Attendants as Members of Parlement

Coffee, tea or me
Her "How To Vote" card said
They all asked for tea


Next: gambling hair-cuts children

Child Frank felt alive,
Gambling blades one through to five,
on a spinning dye.

Next: Almonds, Existentialism, Hover-craft.

Girl says I'm nuts, She's
A philosopher, I'm not,
And she can prove it!

Next: Pianos, Arizona, StarTrek