h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

So, defeat, domino-wise, is admitted.

**Splatt!**

Explain, please, for us mere mortals, where all these shilling beers get there name from. I seem to remember a 40/- as well, is that right?

'Twas duty on a barrel of beer, the higher the alcohol content the greater the duty. These days it more points to a style, as well as warning you off of 90/- unless you are sitting comfortably and have an ambulance on standy. The lowest I have heard of is 60/- which is a bit watery for my tastes. Might be a 40/- but I don't know.

It seems to have been mighty strong - its put everyone to sleep!

I assume that the same type of history is true of "Youngers No.3" - so is there a "Youngers No.1"?
Also - why is Newcastle brown Ale commonly known as "The Dog"?

Listen Squire, I neither know nor care about beers north of Watford. You want to know about Fullers, I'll tell you about Fullers, but thats about it. Newcastle Brown is a very gassy light brown beer, but I have no further recall. If it was down to me you would have one tap of 1845, and thats it. The Landlord (Curses upon him and his family!)he's got better ideas, Oh he knows his punters, He's the clever one. Try and please everyone. What does he know? Now where is he? Eh? Where is he now?

Ah, the legendary sympathetic Landlord, who listens and buys in beer the punter wants. Ine day I will meet you!

Harumph, anyway, where was I... Oh yes No. 1 There is a Number 1, being under the MacEwans name. As it is the same brewery as Youngers (all S&N) we were always of the opinion that they were related, and Number Two was just a bad idea that never got past the initial stages. Not that I've seen Number Three in years. I had a friend who used to go to Thurso to buy it and then horde it for special occasions. Lovely stuff.

The White Hart, in Caistor (see guide entry of WandrinStar's page) still does Youngers No.3 - mm, makes you look forward to going home for that festive thing that's coming up

Thurso? Thurso! For goodness sake, thats almost falling off the top isn't it? What happens in Thurso on a thursday night in November? Is your friend a sheep or some sort of Highland Stag or something, that has to travel to Thurso for excitement?

You can get Number 3!!! Based on the fact we would quite happily travel to Thurso (yes, right off the top) to get it, I'm going to check this up. This is not like the pub in London that advertised Gillespies is it? I spent ages looking for it, and they had none when I got there. I'm going to have to have a calming now. Phew, I was getting a touch hot and bothered there.

Is there permafrost in Thurso? On my map, it's right by the arctic circle...although my map is not to scale and is carried in my head, so this may not be of much use.

Look at that - 15 hours pass, and then we both post at once.

Anyhow - last christmas I had a pint of No.3 in the White Hart. Whether or not they still have it _this_ Christmas is a different matter. As everyone else but me seemed to be drinking Directors they may have discontinued it .

I shall report back on Dec 22nd - assuming there's still things like electricity and computers in Caistor....

Any permafrost there may have been will most certainly have gone due to Dounreay's waste policy. Still makes the sheep look interesting. However, you must remember that it is in the county of Sutherland, just to prove that too far north is a subjective thing.

Whats going on here? Was that a JOKE? Here one for you and one (or 3?) for you. I am very confused about this White Hart? Is it in Thurso? If so, why is it selling Directors? If its in London, why is it selling No. 3? If it is in Caistor, why?

There was a time you could plonk a party seven on the table and everyone was happy!

>>There was a time when you could plonk a party seven on the table and everyone was happy.
Yes - but that was a bad time. It gave rise to things like the new romantics, and perms on chaps, and gritty hard hitting reality theatre...all because the beer was sooo awful.

It's true, the worse the beer (or food) the more people go out and DO things. And we don't want that to happen. If people start DOING things, who knows where it might stop!

The party seven time frame actually spanned several eras. (I thought I saw a Budweiser Party Seven the other day, so perhaps they still exist!) It my time there was also dreams of revolution, sunny julys, beach barbeques, lots of nice girls in short skirts, Lambrettas, guitars and coffee bars!

That was then, this is now!

Yeh, and it is cold out, do you want to put something on the fire then?

Oh right! Its OK for other people, e.g. your loyal and trusted barstaff, to DO things, like sticking passing punters and their coats on the fire, while you just SIT there and complain!

Where did those trees go, anyway?

Ah, but you are doing things in a tried, trusted and inefficient manner which is too be much approved of. Also, it ensures that the rest of us don't do anything, which definately counts as a service to mankind.

(parenthetical entry on RL pub)
I am reliably informed that the White Hart Caistor has recently "improved" as to the keeping of its ales and that the proprietor owes a favour to the other drinking Jones. The duff pub in Caistor (the Red Lion) has closed!! So we may have to get tickets for t'art drinking.
Electricity, yes. Computers will mean visiting the neighbours.
Returns to cellar and the Brandy

Well thanks for that . Can we now assume that there is neither the mythical No 3 or Directors come to that in yon white hart.