h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

OK, will do!

troops, move out! No clinking, now, and eat a throat lozenge so you won't cough. Has everyone been to the toilet? If not, hustle, hustle!

*CYBERHUMAN calls out to everybody from his side of the room*

Okay people, that attack earlier on our dear Lil was only a skirmish to unnerve us. The real battle is still very much ahead. Now there's about 600 of us to an army of over 5,000 robots. Seems like incredible odds doesn't it? Don't worry though people, remember they will be expecting us to attack logically. We must attack illogically! And also they will be unprepared for a two-sided attack! Get ready everybody!

*Crouches down and reloads laser cannon*

600 of us? That'll never work - we need a million-to-one chance

*CYBERHUMAN looks at her reassuringly*

Trust me Mala. It'll work!

If trust were just a simple thing, then trusting I would be

I hope so!

*runs back to her side*

OK, men, women, and everyone else, we're going to do this, we're going to it well, we're all going to come out of it looking like heroes, and if we don'T, last one through the Pearly Gates is a rotten egg!

*sulks*

It certainly unnerved me!

*CYBERHUMAN quickly crosses over to Lil*

Cheer up Lil. Remember I gave you that blaster rifle? Why don't you blast a few robot heads into bits?

*picks up the rifle*.. It's bent!!

*CYBERHUMAN looks at it, then says*

Hmmm. Must have been crushed underneath you when you hit the floor. Nevermind, here have this!

*He grabs a laser cannon and gives it to Lil*

*passes mint sweets around*

Much nicer to have a nice last taste in your mouth rather than all that horrid oil and blood!

*CYBERHUMAN runs a last visual scan of the area ahead of the HQ before the battle*

*uses the laser sighting to get used to the weapon*

Ready when you are boss

Now can I sound long and loud my war-cry?

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeha! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaha!!!

GOD'S FRIEND, THE WORLD'S FOE!!!

*CYBERHUMAN completes his scan*

They're still 500 yards or so from the main entrance. I wonder why they're taking their time...

(Louis cut in: I'm off to bed now folks. See you sometime tomorrow!)

They'Re not as dumb as we thought? Maybe we can't beat them by illogic, if they're led by a seven-year-old, kids arenT' always logical themselves!

(good time to pack up for the night.. )

(definitely - it's late!)

*sets guards, checks radars, and lets remaining troops bed down*