h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*A movement in the trees catches her eye.*

I don't think that'll be necessary.

*She speaks in goa'uld.*

#It's all right. Come out. We won't hurt you.#

*A group of frightened, dirty men stagger toward the mine entrance and fall to their knees.*

#No, it's not like that. We're here to help.#

*They don't move. Scandrea doesn't appear to realize she's speaking goa'uld*

#Er... you can... get up now... seriously.#

**

*walks out of mine entrance*
if you throw me at the flesh eating monster. are you hoping they will die from choleseterol poisining?

*looks at cowereing miners*

whats up with them?

*whispers trying to get scans attention without the miners noticing*

Pssst! Problem! Cut the synthesiser affect! </>

*reaches out and holds a hand infront of Pete to stop him going further*

*to pete* and you, cut it out for a bit </>

no problem.

#Synthesiser effect? What on Earth...#

do... you... oh dear.

That was strange.

*A few of the former miners are looking up, terribly confused.*

Um... let me start again. We're peaceful explorers, and we can help you resettle on a new, not-so-hostile planet.

*sighs and puts on his best happy face*

And I'm here to provide medical assistance, if any of you need it *waves and mutters to scan*

may I ask what happened there? </>

*stowes gun on sholder*

i think we coudl pull off freindly explorers if we hid the automatic weapons. whats going on? how did you do that with your voice? <?>

I... er... maybe...

I think we should deal with that later. You two, organize the evacuation aboard the Daedalus. Ask questions about what happened here, but don't leave anybody behind. I'm going to join LeRue in the mine and see what all they took out.

*Heads into the shaft.*

no problem. theres a clearing about qtr of a mile from here, we can use that as a staging area i'll get them to send the rings down to there.

alright then people lets get moving *glances back at scan and frowns then starts ushering people in the direction of the clearing*

*The men follow Jack's direction. None of them appear to be mortally injured, although nearly all are nursing injuries ranging from cuts and scrapes, to staff weapon burns, right up through broken extremities. It seems that anyone who was too badly injured is still in the mine, and will never leave.*

Sodding jaffa.

*Inside the mine, Scandrea closes the dead man's eyes.*

They took a lot out of here, didn't they?

*Slings his gun*

Yep, let a lot behind as well.

*gestures to an uncovered pit filled with debris and bodies*

*Breaks off a flare and throws it down further, the red flame flickers casting a sinister glare*

*Looks around*

You're the demolitions expert, aren't you?

As soon as we get the living out, I want all of the shafts to this tunnel collapsed. We can't give all these men a proper burial, but we can at least give them a miner's funeral.

*Starts walking toward the face.*

right this first bunch look ready to go.

*clicks radio*

Prometheus; can you send down the rings to this location were going to start sending the first lot up.

*pormetheus acknowledges and the rings come down over the first group of minors and send them up.*

*turns to jack*
how are the injerd? they ok to move up?

<*Ahem* Daedalus *Ahem*, http://www.gateworld.net/omnipedia/index.shtml , and if anyone is interested there's a Fleet Air Arm base near us called HMS Daedalus, 2 years ago there were going to use it to house assylm seekers, until the locals told Tony Blair what he could do with them and his idea>

*looks up from examining someones leg* well, theres no-one who cant be moved if thats what you mean. Though some are going to need some support to stop them making injuries worse by, say, walking on them *looks meaningfully at the person he's examining*