h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Aaaaw it's nothing a good dance won't cure...
*takes The Corrupt Ones hand and starts dancing*
See that's not so bad...
*notices The Corrupt one wince in pain*
Aaah come on, what do you expect if you turn up for a party, you have to dance
*sprinkles some fairy dust about and The Corrupt One's headache is instantly cured*
See now you have no excuse...well no headache excuse anyway

Ummm...well...

*struggles to get away from the dancing*

...gimme a minute and maybe I'll come up with something....

*whispers*

You lost your legs in the world handstanding championships for helicopter pilots.

*pours and *

Here you both go, a little refreshment.

Now that was foolish
*grabs Menza and drags him on to the dance floor ignoring his shouts for help*
And I don't know why you sound so smug
*Finds Wumbeevil hiding under a table and using all her strength picks him up and returns him to the dance floor*
There we go, now isn't this fun
*starts bouncing around and dancing unaware that Santa is quietly harnessing his reindeers whilst the others plan an escape route*

Well, we all heard Santa say the 'M' word back there didn't we? It's only natural that he's got to go and give all the little kiddiwinks their presents isn't it?

Bwahohoho, Merry Xmas everyone.

Aaargh, the witching hour my pumpkin boob tube is about to turn into a coach and horses

*Starts singing "there she goes, there she goes again, chasing through my life...and I just can't escape" in honour of the BT woman"*
...So the question is Wumbeevil have you given in to the BT con and stayed connected using real money as the internet suprisingly just started to work about five minutes before midnight?

What M word, I'm confused now...once I read that Santa was in here I wasn't concentrating very much...although I guess this explains why it was snowing today

This forum is starting to scare me...

You know the 'M' word. 'merry'

I definitely saw Santa say it back there.

Yes I have fallen for BT's con, again, again, again...still it's gonna make paying that extra fiver a month all the more worthwhile (I think there's logic in there somewhere). This might be a good time to resurrect an old ISP to, so BT doesn't get all the money.

Scare you, oh Corrupt one? What's scarey about a fairy with dancing insanity, a pumpkin-boobtubrd Wumbeevil, a Satanic Santa and bar staff who entertain the customers?

Or is it the loss of your legs?

Ummmm...well, what does a normal person think is wrong with a fairy with dancing insanity, a pumpkin-boobtubrd Wumbeevil, a Satanic Santa and bar staff who entertain the customers?

Don't ask me, ask a normal person.

Besides, without the likes of a fairy with dancing insanity, a pumpkin-boobtubed Wumbeevil, a Santanic Satan and bar staff who entertain the customers, how can you judge where to draw the line of your normality?

Me, entertain people. How dare you suggest such a thing.

Well, I think I speak for every Wumbeevil here when I say that I found you very entertaining last night, especially the spontaneous screams of the low blood alcohol dancer.

And once more I miss you by 30 minutes...oh the skill of Bt
How am I suddenly a fairy with dancing insanity...I object! Just because I'm cheerful
I can be depressed if it'll make me seem less insane...I won't find it fun though but as I'm so nice I'll try it if it'll reassure you Mr Corrupt one (although quite why I'm insane when you're the one pushing people into walls is beyond me)

*stops dancing and sits down quietly*
Hmmm
*turns music down*
Hmmm

No, Turn it up.

(surreptitiously changes all the music to Marilyn Manson and The Prodigy)

That should get this party going in the right direction. Bwahahahaaa!!! Now I just need to hand round these hardcore drugs.

*throws Marilyn Manson CD out the window and flushes the Drugs*

There thats better.

I thought I explained that I only torture people who deserve it/ask for it. *groan*

Here's a better CD...*sticks Smash Mouth's "Astro Lounge" into the CD player* ...aaahhh, that's better...

Oh, and by the way, it's Miss Corrupt One to you.

*sits staring glumly at the wall*
Sorry, didn't realise my apologies Miss Corrupt one.
*goes back to sitting quietly*

*now drunk enough to walk into walls unaided by the corrupt one, Wumbeevil attempts to dance with TB. Fails miserably, and so performs a sword dance with two of Ændr's best steak knives*

Hoots mon, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, aargh!

*Scholars may take may wish to note the subtle differnce between low blood alcohol screaming, and High blood alcohol screaming*