h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*steps out facing opposite g12 and points olive loaf menacingly at all the other g's*

stay away now, I don't want to have to use this but very probably will if you come any nearer

*realizes how stupid this sounds and shakes his right fist in the air to try and back up his statement*

*lounging in a tree*

< g12 is mearly goon number 12 because there not importent enough to get names>

[g12] come on then smartie.. come and see
*grabs the nearest person and holds a dagger to there neck*
make it worth my day

< yes I already knew that, I thought that since they weren't important enough to give names to that they probably aren't worth spelling out either>

*wonders what has happened to Coren*

ah well

*pulls goons arm backward so as to pull elbow out of place, then takes knife from goon and uses it to cut off a thin slice of olive loaf, finds some nearby bread, mayonnaise, lettuce, tomatoes, dill pickles, cheese, and thousand island dressing, adds them all to the olive loaf in a very familiar manner and then in a very threatening manner holds it up*

I'll give you a sandwich if you just leave

Coren: *leaps up into the tree and starts shooting at the goons with broadhead arrows*

*three of the goons drop down dead*
*goon 12 steals the sandwage and then falls to the ground dead where the sandwage is stolen from his corps and another dies as well.... this continues for a rediculous time till there is one left who has gotten the message and draws a reppeter cross bow*


dont make me fire this

*stands behind the goon and places a knife at his throat*


doon't make /me/ use /this/

*the goon turns pale and shakes*
how... did you get there?

I am an assasin, now stop with the stupid questions.

*presses knife against the gonns throat*


tell you what i will give you to options.

1) surrender now and get taken to the brig.

2) put down you weapons and start runing, and see if you can get away before i shoot you.


which would you prefer

tell me first...
did a package get delivered to the medical rooms?

i wouldn't know, now answer or die where you stand.

*drops his weapon*

Kill me if you must i am unarmed!

now you want to surrender or try and run for it?

take me to the brig you curr

*realese the knife from the gons throat and kicks out his legs


when the goon is down WIRO ties the goons hands, then drags him out of the grounds toward the torture chamber not the brig*



the brig it is.



*a duck is sent ahead to tell them to prepare the chamber*

Coren: Why didn't you let me finish him off? *pouts* *the effect of the pan galactic gargle blaster he drank in the signup thread hits him and he falls out of the tree* Ooo, that was weird. *accidentally shoots the tree trunk* Oops, can't see straight! Heehee.

Esty: Yes, he always acts this stupid when he's drunk. It takes him a while to get that way, though.

Coren: I heard that? Prepare... to be... poked! *points his finger at Esty, walks over, and pokes her*

Hey, is there anywhere I can let off some steam?

*holds up her uzi*

The poison Olive Loaf is more formidable than one might think...to the torture chamber!!!

<>

*stalks in looking hacked off and sets up targets at end of range*
If that blooming *fire* Dr *fire* Anthea *fire* had blooming *reload* known that *fire* you don't *fire* kill *reload* fairies...

*calls up program adie412ZAlpha*

then I wouldn't *rolls behind a tree as Hirogens stream out of a nearby airlock* have such *searches for nearest jeffries tube* bothers with the damn *slips in, replaces cover and waits for Hirogen* guild and spies!

*Hirogen stalk past and Kat bursts out firing with compression rifle and bashing the closest Hirogen with the butt of the rifle. It's a bath of blood and Kat slips all over the place but her fury keeps her upright until every Hirogen is dead*

Computer *Simulation complete. Adie did not complete the simulation according to settings. All enemy eliminated*

*Kat slumps in a corner covered in sweat and crying*