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You're the proud new owner of a twittery bird, a big golden pick-axe and a shiny helmet with a funny flashing light? Then you must be an Offical UnderGuide Miner! Well done, you passed the selection test. "What test?" you ask. Exactly. However, it's not as simple as just jumping in boots 'n' all. The following will hopefully give the virgin Miner an idea of how to stay alive in the Mines.

The Pit

The Pit for the UnderGuide Miners is mostly the Alternative Writing Workshop, although other 'shafts' are the remainder of h2g2. This mean that writing for the UnderGuide can be found anywhere throughout h2g2, but most of the Gems come from the AWW. Many writers work will follow the UnderGuideLines, as these are thoroughly relaxed, so it's easy to find something you think will be great for the UG. Once you've found an appropriate Gem you let everyone at the 'Pig & Slag' know by nominating it, or casting your vote.

When voting for an Entry, write a message in the 'Pig & Slag' with the subject line containing the following;

'Vote for A-Number, Title and Author.'

Of course, the A-Number section will have your chosen Entry A-Number, Title will read the title of the piece and Author, the author, naturally (The same routine is followed when seconding, just replace the word 'Vote' with the word 'Seconding').

In the actual message itself, give reasons for your choice and a hyperlink to the Entry². This makes it easier for everyone else to find the Entry and to understand why you decided it should be in the UnderGuide. It also makes the UG Editors jobs so much simpler, and that can't be a bad thing. A bad thing is not putting air-freshener in the en-suite. It's also advisable to drop a line about what you've chosen and why to the Mining Admin. Then it's jumped on by an eager Gem Polisher to do the rest.

Shaft Maintenance

Miners also help maintain the Alternative Writing Workshop, offering advice and support to authors and also essential mine-sweeping. Minesweeping is a relatively simple process whereby the Miner scans through the AWW for entries that are not gems, but perhaps lumps of ‘pebble-dash’³. If the author is still around, then the Miner will politely bring this to their attention and ask if they are still working on it. It is very important that Miner’s don't say that an entry is not suitable for the UnderGuide, (especially if the author is still working on it) as this is a matter of personal opinion and a Miner saying this reflects upon the entire UnderGuide.

Remember that the UnderGuide doesn't control the AWW, so remarking “This is not suitable for the UG” isn't a great excuse for it to be moved anyway. Usually by bringing an entry to the attention of the author, you can either help them make their entry the best it can be, or make them remember it so that they can work on it or move it somewhere else such as the Writing Workshop or Collaborative Writing Workshop so even more h2g2 Researchers can give input and ideas.

If an author of an unsuitable entry has left the building or 'Elvised'⁴, then Miners propose a move in the AWW review conversation to either the Flea Market (if it has EG potential and was placed in the AWW by mistake) or back to the entry. Another Miner will then second this, in the same way votes are cast, then the move is suggested in the 'Pig & Slag', where the UG Editors will take care of the business. This may take some time, as there's other things Editors do, like buying rounds and washing cormorants. If an author wonders what happens after their Entry has been 'mined' simply direct them here.

CAC-ing

Another field of Mining involves helping out the CAC. The CAC is constantly on the look out for writing that for some reason or another doesn't not fit into either Edited Guide Writing Guidelines, or the loose UnderGuideLines. It can often be Fiction, Personal, Scientific, Satire or even just plain weird⁵. Work for the CAC must follow guidelines, just as all published writing within h2g2 must. The Alternative Writing-Guidelines are somewhat more stringant though. Stringant, no that's not the word. Non-existant. That's the word. So as a Miner you can recommend writing and/or authors to the CAC Continuum, which is published in every Edition of The Post⁶.

Feeding the Pit Pony

Please, no matter the danger, no matter the cost of dignity to yourself, don't take it too seriously⁷. Have fun!