h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

like dandruff,soot and snow flecks

It's fairly straightforward,
And there's nothing more good,

save certain forms of tantric sex

**)(**

In Scotland a pig ate a whistle

And nearly choked on the plastic gristle,

you're risking, my man
the wrath of the clan

(now somebody has to include something
rude and painful with a thistle)

In fact they will surely Bristle.....




A fight's what we all need

that, and the elimination of all world poverty and greed

NOW, we're seeing some reason,
it must be the season. . .

pent up issues are now being freed

{}{}{}{}{}{{}{}{}{}{}{}{}{{}{}{}{}{}

Is Christmas a time for greed or for giving?

Let's forget about greed - just get on with living

Like playing with snow,
Or getting a blow...

...dried haircut like that nice David Niven



I'll be getting no gifts on this Christmas Day

Because I;m Jewish; a dreidal I'll play...

but I don't give a hoot
'cos I'll count all my loot

and celebrate in a most peculiar way

:(::

Santa Clause was invented by Coca Cola
He was really a drag queen called Lola
The job suited him
'cos he liked the fur trim
but he could never tell **** from shinola

:(::

For Christmas I will eat lots of hair

Which I certainly don't plan to share
With the homeless or poor
Who may knock at my door

without any hair I don't dare

----------------

Mrs Santa's forgotten her pill

'cos that would be really unfair.

=================================

Christmas decor is getting me down

Mrs Santa's painted everything brown

The Trees and the Lights,
Her Fishnet Tights