h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I don't recall mocking his hunch

------------------------------------------

There once was a maiden so fine

As it was my mouth that had caused the affront.

(Whoops, ignore mine as I forgot to start a new one anyway )

Who would tie up the telephone line

With her rather long rants

On the merits of pants

As made by Calvin Klein

(Whoops that'll be moderated!)......

============================

A Furry Pussy from the Isle of Skye

(Not as likely as that one)

Was fond of tuna fish pie

Whilst scoffing its food

It made sounds quite rude

And smells that could cause you to die

================

The problems for cattle and sheep

Are enough to make you weep

But Horses and hens

Still wander the fens

And avoid an eternal sleep

==================

There once was a man with a phone

A mobile it was, and he droned

He yakked all day long,

Though he knew it was wrong,

So everything else was postponed.

-------------------------------------

A snack made of biscuits and cream

Is a wonderful teatime theme

'though Scones are much better