h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

“But...I saw you die!”
“You can’t kill someone who’s already dead.”
“What the...?!”

Apparently, a survey of American films made from 1938 to the late 80's showed that 85% of the films contained the line 'Let's get out of here!'

To dog whining and snuffling in hedge: "What is it, boy? There's nothing there!"

"If this ever gets out, we're finished!"

"You'll never work in this town again"

"There's nothing more you can do here, Jim. Why don't you go home?"

To return to "Miss Jones", I think it's a few years since..." but you're beautiful!" was actually said in a film, but it is true that

a) a young beautiful actress can look exactly like a top nuclear physicist if she wears specs and puts her hair up. Addition of a few phrases like "particle accelerator" and "increase the tectonic pressure to 478 degrees" to the script around this stage enhances the illusion.

b) as soon as she gets into the action scenes with the no-nonsense hero she has to explain the plot too, her vision will suddenly become 20-20 again, her glasses will be lost, and her lab coat will get irretrievably burned in a nuclear explosion, revealing the mini-dress she wears underneath. Unfortunately her IQ usually goes the way of her lab coat at this point...

Not exactly a film, but in Star Trek - the Next Generation, when they're having trouble with one of the systems, Geordi will _always_ mention 'the subroutine' when Picard asks him how long it will take to fix.

Incidentally, am I the only one who wants Geordi to say something like 'Aye that's a canny bairn ye've got there, ye knaa?' or 'Data, man, ye divvent need te gan doon the jeffries tube.'

I thought so.

Hi, DO. These are acute and valuable observations for the Cliche Film Situations forum. I've started compiling stuff, and if this lot ends up as a Guide entry ( which I reckon it ought to), they'll be in there!

"No! That's just what they'll be expecting!"

"For you, the war is over."

"We're safe at the moment - they only attack at night."

Hello, oops, sorry, yes. I now realise that observation was really in the wrong thread, but I am bouncing between the Quotes and Situations conversations and sometimes I get a little bit confused. (I'm not wearing my lab coat, you see.)

Errr... how about "Are you ready?"/"I was born ready"?

Hey, well put yer lab coat back on and then you can say:

"My work! It's too important for anything to stop me now!"

You're quite right. "Twenty years of work and you want me to throw it all away!!"

(Obviously I never made a back-up copy or anything...)

Hey, gang - great fun though this is, try watching ANY movie for the next two or three weeks and find your respect for screenwriters totally blown... I watched a dreadful Michael Douglas film last night, and could hardly keep up with noting them down, so here's som more for your Christmas stocking...

"You know you won't shoot me, so just give me the gun."

"It's alright Sir, we'll handle it from here."

(in a slurred voice) "There was something in my drink, wasn't there?"

"Don't worry - you're one of us now."

"Why don't they answer?!"

"Damn! What's wrong with this lift?"

"I CAN'T! I CAN'T!" "You must!"

"Now! Give me what I want!"

"Your money's no good here..."

"Ah! Come in, my dear. Mr Smith was just leaving."

"Yes, it is rather exquisite, don't you think?"

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you right now..."

"Do you really want to gamble with the lives of hundreds of innocent people?"

"I never thought I could feel this way about anyone again."

Phew! off for a lie down, now!

Hey, gang - great fun though this is, try watching ANY movie for the next two or three weeks and find your respect for screenwriters totally blown... I watched a dreadful Michael Douglas film last night, and could hardly keep up with noting them down, so here's som more for your Christmas stocking...

"You know you won't shoot me, so just give me the gun."

"It's alright Sir, we'll handle it from here."

(in a slurred voice) "There was something in my drink, wasn't there?"

"Don't worry - you're one of us now."

"Why don't they answer?!"

"Damn! What's wrong with this lift?"

"I CAN'T! I CAN'T!" "You must!"

"Now! Give me what I want!"

"Your money's no good here..."

"Ah! Come in, my dear. Mr Smith was just leaving."

"Yes, it is rather exquisite, don't you think?"

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you right now..."

"Do you really want to gamble with the lives of hundreds of innocent people?"

"I never thought I could feel this way about anyone again."

Phew! off for a lie down, now!

I'll just go and check down in the basement!

"where to?"

"Just drive"

"it's your money, bud"

Normally in spy thriller type films when the hero jumps into the back of a cab to escape the baddies.

Alternatively, if it's a horror movie...

Driver: Where are you heading for?
Passenger: Nowhere (or possibly "Hell")
Driver totally fails to drive away as fast as possible.
Two minutes later:-
Driver: Argggghhhhhh....*splutter* *die*

What price road safety, eh?

Yes but what about Westerns...?

"O.K. Mister, stick 'em up..."

"Where the HELL is that artillery..?"

" need it here and I need it NOW!!"

"It's a TRAP!!!"

"Oh yeah, one more thing sir..."

No you're Not, Newcastle living scot Hxx
Why aye Cap'n

In reply to the one about we only need ten more seconds to trace that call, remember in all good spy movies "Damn, he hung up, we only needed 3 more seconds to track him"
or the cop version...
"Just keep him talking" "But What can I say" "Just keep him talking"
"We got him"
I didn't realise there were so many people as anal as me out there!!
Hxx

'We've got to stop meeting like this'

*Now is the time to impliment Plan B!*
shazzPR