h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Corrigible] I second that. Let's get outta here.

[As they leave the building, they bring out the auto Romeo maker again, and make another Romeo.]

[Romeo] Oh Juliet ...

[Juliet] Oh Romeo ... have a nice day!

[She brings out a bomb with the letter H on it.]

[Director] [offstage] NOT THAT ONE!

[She tosses it and it his Romeo. Nuclear explosion. Cut to Corrigible, Scandrea, and Laguna, standing near a sign with an arrow saying "QRRBRBIRLBEL."]

[Corrigible] ... What the hell was THAT!?

I don't know, but I'm not following that sign!

*Walks in the opposite direction the arrow is pointing.*

I think we should try and get out of this universe as quickly as we can!

[Corrigible] Me too.

[He runs off the screen. Cut to an empty white space with hills on the background; Corrigible runs into the area, and stops and pauses.]

[Corrigible] I just KNOW something stupid is going to happen.

[A wagon rolls across the hills. Riding on it is a sort of bullet-shaped "stick figure" on a triangle, holding an umbrella. Uh, just look here: http://firstreality.keenspace.com/img/DoingGloing.gif]

[Doing Gloing] [bobbing up and down, rapidly, half-intelligible] I'm a badoingy doing doingy doing doing gloing!

*Walks into the camera shot behind Corrigible.*

Are you coming or no- what the heck?

[Correction: his name is Boing Gloing.]

[Boing Gloing] [coming into the shot behind her] I'm a badoingy doing doingy doing doing gloing!

[Another Mr. Weight falls on top of his head, then pops back up again.]

Uhh... yeah...

Hey, I think I found another portal over that way. Want to come?

Erm... Where did Laguna go?

[Laguna] [standing behind her] RITE HEER!!11!1!!!

[Corrigible] Let's go, then!

*Leads the way to an opening in space glowing green.*

*Through the poral is a richly illustrated (but still cartoon) landscape, complete with mountains, forests, gleaming castles, and dark fortresses.*

It looks like we've wondered into some fantasy comic.

[Corrigible] Okay ... it looks /kinda/ familiar ... I can't quite place it, though ...

Neither can I...

*Suddenly, walking along the road appears four humans- er... just go to http://archive.gamespy.com/comics/nodwick/NodwickStats/roguesgallery.html and see for yourself! The short guy with the helmet is carrying more than is humanly possible.*

Oh... wait...

[Yeagar] *to group* I don't know, maybe these loser know where it is! *to Corrigible et. al.* Excuse me, is this the right road to The Forest of Bad Odds of Returning?

I subscribe to the Nodwick comics, actually ...


[Corrigible] ... Maybe.

[Laguna] IT MIET BEE!1!!!1!

[Woogy] [suddenly appearing from behind a sign saying "Forest of Bad Odds Of Returning"] YEZZ INDEEEEEEE!D!!1!1 [almost vibrating on that last bit]

[Corrigible] Okay, where the hell did that ball guy come from? Didn't we leave him behind in Laguna's universe?

[Laguna] HE WUZ WIHT ME!11!!1!

cool

*Artax sends a fireball at Woogy*

[Piffany] That wasn't very nice!

[Woogy gets knocked back]

[Woogy] [the F-word scribbled out] OW!!1!1

[Nodwick] Is it just me, or is that even /more/ shoot-first-and-ask-questions-later than usual?

I think it is...

[Artax] Sorry, I thought he was an elemental with a magical disguise.

[Lampwick] Really? You've met them before?

[Corrigible] Uh, it's kinda complicated.

Sorry, that was supposed to be Nodwick, not Lampwick, and he was responding to Scandrea.

That's fine </>

Well, you see, I'm actually a superheroine, and he's a supervillain, and during a battle we got sucked into this alternate universe where we picked up these guys, and now we're looking for Laguna's... erm... yeah...

Now we're looking for a guy named Joseph. Have you seen him?

*Looks at the adventurers' confused stares.*

[Corrigible] Just ... let us know if you see any strange portals that you can't find any other explanation for, will ya?

[Artax] ... Fine.

[Yeagar] Are you coming or not? The Tavern of the Eternal Happy Hour won't find itself, you know!

[Piffany] I thought we were looking for The Temple of Goodliness?

[Yeagar] We are... it's... uh... right next door!

[Corrigible] [whispering to Scandrea] I'm not sure which is more ridiculous ... these ridiculous explanations, or the fact that she appears to /believe/ 'em.