h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The quality of the opposition seems to be very very poor at the moment - a TRED who is so gullable it's really hardly worth the effort and a Manboy who, well, not exactly filled with the fight of the good fight hmm?

I know exactly what you mean, Fate. Egads, we don't want to deal with these second rate sidekicks. TRED, Manboy ... do your worst! Fate, prepare to be mildly amused by their confused flapping about!

BWA!

Although I am currently an innocent civilian, I think I'd like to join the forces of evil. Especially because I think Evil Giraffe is a very original name for an evil giraffe.
Is it true that you have chocolate digestive biscuits on the Dark Side? And do you drive mopeds (evil mopeds, of course. Painted black, with spiky bits on the wheels, as to injure the shins of superheroes)?

Manboy draws his mighty scissors and runs about aimlessly. He pokes Evil Giraffe in the eye.

Nice name! Truly evil!
Welcome to the evil side!
(Yes it's true about the biscuits, but not about the scones)
We were in dire need of some other evil doers,
Evil G had best ask the evil questions of you

Any type of villainous vehicle (spiked on unspiked) is welcome here in Evil Inc.

Scumpit, a few questions. Just how evil are you? What are your evil powers? What was your last dastardly deed? Do you have a maniacal laugh (not required, but preferred)?

Bwaaa-haaa-haaa-ha-h ... h ... hooo!

Sorry, Manboy, but I was wearing Anti-scissor-stab-eye-protection-goggles!

Okay, yes. I was just wondering if I could join both the forces of Good and Evil? Like I flip a coin when I wake up or something?

...

Are you Good or Evil?
It's a question of life choices, life styles, attitude etc, not like deciding wether to have cornflakes or shreddies for breakfast
You can't be both, (had trouble with that sort before).
You must know in your heart which you really are

Hmmm... (flips a coin) Evil it is! (Ties a black cape around his neck)Hail Discordia! Gwahahahahahahaha!!!

However, this is subject to change, depending on who has the best insentives, and the best tea.

Is that orange discordial?

Ummm... Orange doesn't seem very Discordic... I'd have to go with yellow Discordia, which is almost as good.

We have the best tea, ask TRED,
Mwa mwa mwa

Also, how is this for a Manical Laugh: "Gwahahahahahahahaha! Yah yah yah! Bffffffffffffffffffffffft!"
I've been working on it for a while.

Oh, and from now on, I'm Discordia Man

Lemon discordial?

Well, yeah, I guess. Want some of my Discordial?

It is very good. Gwahahahahahahahahaha! Yah yah yah! Bfffffffffffffffffffffffffft!

If it's lemon discordial we've got Vestboy nailed
Mwa