h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yeah, that Garibaldi, he takes the biscuit...

Oh, please yourselves.

Now, I'll have to check my Knight's war chest, but I may still have some shares in a Stock-building firm. I made a mint during the Inquisition, which I didn't expect. And I'm not talking about Slpuddkupp McPlurr either, who went bust during the Stock Market Crash.

*rummages noisily*

Let's see - Holy Grill... Chalice from the Palace...what's this? Ah that's where the Vessel with the Pestle went...bag of doughnut holes...no wait - that's empty....spare brake pads for Cherokee the Wonder Jeep...elapsed Tufty Club Membership Card...Aah! Here we are.

*produces crumpled yellowed piece of paper from war chest*

"Messrs Payne and Sufferynge, Stock builders of Distinction. Competitive rates, prompt attention."

I'll get on to them right away. If they can't have a nice pair of Stocks knocked up by Sunday, my middle name's not Ignatius.

er...spiny? I didn't know your middle name WAS Ignatius...
[oops...maybe I shouldn't have mentioned that]
}:=8

Hey oh Spiked One... ~snigger~.... your middle name is not really Ignatius is it?

Shall I bring the refreshments on Sunday?

*Thinks Sunday may be a day well worth chewing through the leather straps*

'Nonnie

~Greebo jumps up and down in excitement~... We are all such nice people... ~grin~... throwing this wonderful party for the mean and evil Garibaldi...

Err - Garibaldi seems to be conspicuous by his absence.... Does anyone know where he's got to??

Greebo, please stop jumping up and down coz you're making me sea sick!

just out of interest, what was all that talk of us being trapped in side of a bigger experiment being run by his assistant, garibaldi may have stopped being evil for the time being, but what about his assistant? for all we know we could be trapped in some kind of subspace bubble! arrgghh

Yeah, but what is Planet Earth if not some kind of subspace bubble?

Whatever, as long as it doesn't get in the way of a good public spanking. Unfortunately I'll miss it because I'll be in La France on Sunday *Hums "I love Paris in the springtime...*

Er...no, Ignatius is a figment of my diseased brain. Still, what do you think? I rather like it. And it gives me a cool set of initials: Spiny Ignatius Norman.

And don't worry about Garibaldi - he won't get far with that big green amd yellow earth cable strapped to his ankle. At least he's safe to touch without fear of electric shock at the moment (always a worry with these Mad Scientists). But now the question arises - who is to give him the spanking on Sunday? Perhaps Queen blu could dispatch one of the Damogran State Executioners. A bit over the top for a mere spanking perhaps, but it will lend a certain gravitas to the proceedings, and scare the sh*t out of Garibaldi as well...

I'm here. Sorry I took so long, but I couldn't let people see me cry. I'm starting to worry about my assistant I haven't seen her for a while. But I think I am cured.

*goes over to Greebo and gives her a pat* See, I'm not that back

As the president wandered on, he wondered whether he should hold one of his famous speeches about
family values, consistency and cohesion at this moment. Seeing the one they named Garibaldi patting on the back the cute cat he wished to experiment on earlier, he abandoned the thought though. The two events didn't seem to be linked causally, but one never knew with this president. He found a small coloured cube and started to toy with it.

~Greebo smiles really rather nicely at Garibaldi~.. Hmmm... me won't be around for the spanking either... me going off for a birthday party... ~hurrumphhh~.... ~Greebo perks up~... but if someone could video it for me... ~expectant grin~

*Gwennie offers up her camcorder* It's a bit big and old (like me) but it goes well when it's battery is charged up (also like me!).

Garibaldi seems to be thoroughly repentant, perhaps we should let him off anyway... *Mistress Gwennie looks round for someone else to spank...* Oh well, time to put the S&M kit away then...*sigh*!

Me had a friend called Mandy who was marrying Sean... ~grin~... she wanted their initials on the cake... but she didn't wan't M&S as it stood for Marks and Spencer... so she went for S&M instead... it wasn't until she wondered what people was giggling at that she realised what S&M stood for... ~grin~

In some parts of the world, spankings are part of birthday celebrations. One lash [er...spank] for each year of the celebration. Perhaps if we snuck this in to Garibaldi's birthday celebration on Sunday we could achieve our goal and get to go to a party at the same time.
*hehehehe*
We prob'ly need to wear something other than the leather boots, etc., though. Not 'xactly 'birthday party attire'.

Maybe there will be refreshments...maybe doughnuts...

}:=8

Hmm... S&M, that is something I haven't exprienced. But a bit of spanking at the party sounds like a good thing.

Me wants doughnuts NOW!!!!

Spanking is out, donuts are in, can't you read?

*rushes in from her long absence with a tray of donuts for Greebo*
monsy

Now then, now then, then now! *Offers cream & jam filled doughnuts to all and sundry* Look on them as a culinary peace pipe!

On the culinary subject, Greebo..... That wedding cake tale was a cracker! I must remember to tell John about it! Do I have your permission to borrow a ~grin~?