h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

~grin~... me would give my friends anything... so of course you may have a grin Gwennie... ~huggle~... and as to you Garibaldi... ~bigger grin~... Me a cat... so of course me can't read... silly you!!!!

*Gwennie makes a huge ~grin~* Ohh! That was funtastic! I just have to do one more...... ~grin~ ..... Wheee! Wot fun being a cat must be! *Huggles Greebo back*

Being a cat is the bestest thing me knows... ~grin~... but then me hasn't practised being much else lately... so me not sure what being something else would be like...

Well, you could always try being a dog or something.... Jump up, lick people's faces, fart a lot, lick yer bum and sniff and lick other dogs' bums too! My dogs even used to eat the cat poo out of the litter tray when the cats were kittens! (Eeuch!) Lots of worming tablets all round, I can tell you!

Second thoughts, maybe a parrot - you could whistle tunlessly, swear at and call people rude names and they'd just think you're copying someone or other...

~grin~... that first one sounds like a cat anyway... errrr... except for eating poo of course... ~grinny grin~... doughnuts taste far better... er... not that me would know you understand... me has never... ever... eaten poo in my life... honest...

The second sounds like any little old lady that you happen to meet up the road... ~bigger girn~... except you forgot to mention about closing doors in your face and muttering about the youth of today... and things were not like it when they were younger!!!!

Rant alert!

Ah yes! The species known as the rude old ladies - I have to be careful here as only 17 years until I'm collecting a pension!

Mair travels on a public bus service to school every day and I've always told her that she should give up her seat to old people and mothers with young children (as well as hold doors open for people). However, she's rapidly becoming resentful with this as seldom has anyone said "Thank you" to her and she's getting fed up with holding doors open or standing back to allow people to go through doorways first, only to be completely ignored while a whole crowd of other ingrates come through too! How are the younger generation supposed to respect their elders and be polite when it's not reciprocated?

I know how she feels though - I usually say very loudly "That's alright - thanks..." if I'm rudely ignored! (Nobody's yet hit me!)

Hmmm... me understands completely your feelings... me has a cat friend called Wilfred... who regularily takes home a dead mouse for his human friend... is he thanked... is he told what a wonderful feline he is... oh nooooooooooooo... and they throw his tribute in the bin to add insult after injury!!!!!!!

My moggies run like the proverbial clappers when they've got a mouse or birdie and see me approaching as I always rescue the wee beasties! I have a trick now and tell Jess (our collie cross) to chase them which results in the bird or mouse, if it's still healthy enough, to make it's escape... It worked yesterday when Suzie had a black bird in our yard... She looked really annoyed - ears sideways - and refused to look at me!

Hmmm... bet she thought you were a spoilsport...

Yes, I'm an absolute bounder!

Suzi's okay now and is back to her usual affectionate self again... I had to bribe her with some cat nip though!

Every morning, when I scoop out the wild bird seed,(in the garage), I find mice, (which I release into the garage) You know, I can't for the life of me where I was going with this. I believe I was supposed to drop off a case of bottled love. It's free, and everyone (everything) could use it.

I once had a cat who brought me such presents twice a day at least! I always thanked and complimented her and never did I throw her offerings away. In stead, I shared them with her: she got to eat the gift, and I got to "enjoy" the sounds of her laying under my bed gnawing on the bones.

After all: how would I make this creature understand that I'm really not that fond of dead mice and birds? She thought she was doing me a favor, and I loved the gesture!

my cat is too lazy for any of that stuff...if it does not come to her in a bowl she will not touch it ...even when placed outside for fresh air she will not leave the yard and i have even seen birds sitting right beside her under our big tree out front....
hmmmm....maybe i get another cat to show her what she is supposed to be doing....
monsy

Nah! Let her be Monsy! Maybe she enjoys watching them more than harassing them!

I've two cats that run riot in the spring with the fledglings but others who just sit and watch. Maybe they're just intelligent and realise it's easier without munching through feathers or fur! The dogs usually ambush any attempts to stalk a bird! They think it's some sort of game.

~Greebo is getting upset... she's not liking all this talk of death and mutilation... Greebo grimaces~

*reaches down and picks up Greebo placing her in her lap and begins petting her to calm her down a bit*
no need to worry, we did not mean to upset your pretty little head with all this talk...here, have a donut it will make you feel all better
monsy

~Greebo munches on the doughnut... content to be comforted by monsy.. ~

Gwennie , you say you have 2 cats. YOu wouldn't happen to be less fond of one over the other would you, I know someone who is looking for cats.

... and the president did some more wandering and wondering. A random question popped into his head: Where does a cat purr?
He wondered where it came from. Perhaps it came from the small coloured cube he was toying with. perhaps not.
perhaps it had something to do with the crowd of people he had by now circled a few times in his wandering. They were less frantic with things now that the cat had been rescued and the evil people had been promised a hearty spanking. Where had that idea gone to anyway? Well... not my bother, the president thought. Though he would like to know where the cat's purr comes from. The belly?
It's throat? Rubbing its hind legs together? Who knows, thought the president, and wandered on. He found a teddy pig with one eye, but it wasn't what he was after.

*sneaks up behind the president and begins stroking his hair*
this is where a cat purrs...
monsy