h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'll not say what I was about to say.

Nice typo there, btw.

I'm not going to offer any advice. One, I'm not a parent and 2 I didn't follow in my parents footsteps, especially the old man's.
I'll just leave afor you Bel.

indeed. now that you point it out

goodnight sweetheart, i really have to turn in now

Thanks, ST.

Goodnight Pierce.

I'll have to stay for a while longer, my work isn't done yet.

I will follow ST B'El, even though I've brought a boy and girl up for the last 16yrs alone, I will not offer advice because each situation is different and as all know, it can change even hourly. So even advice given in good faith could cause matters to worsen.


a 6ft bull whip or electric cattle prod

That's not me, either.

at a teacher meeting thingy for my daughter, when she was in the junior school, when the class teach' said how well behaved she wasI said it's that 6ft bull whipyou should have seen her face, until the proverbial penny dropped - she believed I used one on the kids

I think that non-parents *can* give parents advice. After all, I'd never ask for advice *just* from men because I'm a man. We all have experience of the world be it as man, woman, young, old, married, divorced, spinster, bachelor, gay, straight, celebate, curious... I hope you all know what I mean. What I'm saying is that advice can be valuable wherever it comes from and, sometimes, an 'outsider' can give advice that puts a whole new slant on things.

Bel, went into one a bit there. It sounds to me like you're doing well by your kids *and* your dad and mil. If you can stay true to yourself and trust your heart then let their jibes run off your back and keep doing what you seem to be doing so well- being a caring and conscientious person who happens to be a mother, daughter, daughter in law, friend, editor and everything else that you are...

And the best thing about advice is that you can take it or leave it

Stay and Bel

Bel a good parent knows when to let their children go and is there to pick them up when they fall and make mistakes. You have done a good job in that your son felt he could go and do this. As for monster in law....ask your self what sort of job she did bringing up her son....I listen go yes I'm sure you are right and then ignore them anyway. I always have done. at the end of the day once a person is an adult (over 16/ 18 years depending on the country) they have the right in law to make most of their own decisions and all you can do is support them.
You have done a good job and don't ever forget it

She's nit a monster, she's nice but doesn't know her limits, and as there's nobody to tell her I don't think she'll ever know.

if she is well meaning then really all you can do is listen and then go your own way anyway. Sometimes you have to remind grandparents that children are now adults and able to make their own decisions.I am sure it will all turn out ok Bel.It will just take time

my sister - 9 yrs younger than me - no problem with mam, but ME! brought 2 kids up 58 next month(tough)but to mam I'm still in short trousers and still told I should do this / that etcI can't win(but still do my own thing co's it works)

I'm sure it will work out somehó. It's just a nuisance being in a position where I have to 'defend' things.

My father *literally* still seems to think I'm a kid. He insists on holding my hand to cross streets so I won't be run over

i told my mum that mothers are completely unable to give 'good advice'. and mother-in-laws many times more so.

because children and children-in-laws will never perceive it as 'good advice', but 'untimely meddling'.

that really made her shut up and think






well, for about two minutes or so...

Sounds like your son knows what he's doing - he could be bumming around playing computer games all day, but as Mala said, he appears to have made an informed decision based on his skills and interests. Hard to see how they can criticise that, really.

Do you have military service in Germany then? I've never heard that. Or did I misunderstand your post?

Mal, maybe he wants to hold your hand crossing the road so *he* won't get run over.

It's called Wehrdienst here, Elentari, you have to either do Wehrdienst at the Bundeswehr, or you can refuse to do it, then you'll have to do 'Zivildienst', which is similar work to what they do during the voluntary social year, just three months shorter.

Oh, and he *did* sit at his PC all day for a long time - until the husband took his monitor away.