h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hazel - I have never been wise when it comes to yaks....whilst some women are attracted to complete and utter bounders - I am attracted to hair and horn....it's my cross and I bear it well.

Evening Hazel and CG

Beautiful day but too hot for sunbathing.

If CG is to be allowed her yak then I must insist on bringing my camel. He gets very lonely on his own.

As well as a water feature could we have a cycle path because Pat is encouraging the use of these two wheeled thingies. Plus I assume that in the vegetable garden we will have swedes and turnips?

Hi Magster, I'm not really sure the garden is large enough to accomodate all these animals - but if that's the way you built it - what can I say?

As to vegetables - definitely! However, I think we may decide to keep the cyco-path count as low as possible

Mind if I build a replica of the Millennium Dome in the garden?

Oh, and I'd like a bouncy castle too.

Forget the Dome - let's have a real funfair- with a great big RollerCoaster!
Wheeeeeeee! And those silly shooting-booths with wonky rifles...... anything off the bottom shelf... toffee apples.....

Sorry. It's been a little hot & sticky today

...and candyfloss and a hall of mirrors and a tunnel of love where Legers can take his wenches and a crazy golf course and...

Wahey!

Glad you've turned up Ali - I thought I was going to have to go on the train by myself - get all that fake cobwebby stuff in my hair - then the bit when you get off at the end and you get that puff of air ...

But I'm not going on the waltzers - can't take them anymore - especially after that dodgy hotdog...

No spuds in the veggie patch

Dodgy hotdogs! Urgh! Like dodgy burgers and dodgy meat pies. I had you down as a candy floss girl Hazel, not a hotdog girl.

Now as it is Wimbledon next week I think we should have a tennis court.

Oh no, it's nearly that time of year, innit? Does that mean wall-to-wall Henpants?

I heard today that Anna Kournikova will not be playing due to injury. Is there any other tennis talent to watch out for, I wonder?

Can I have a statue of Lenin in the garden?

Magster - actually more "99" than Candyfloss! With a double Flake

Now I think Pat may disagree with you over the Spuds issue - and after all they would be organic, what with the Yak & camel droppings.....

Tennis, Ali. Mmmm. Well I'll just let you guess how interested I am in that!

Ali, some 16 year old Russian, cannot remember her name, did well at Edgbaston last week. Got up Kournikova's 's cos the big K said that the original was always the best and imitations were just not very nice. Ouch!

CG saunters into the (rather cramped) garden and is delighted to see a fine erection in the shape of Lenin at it's very centre. On closer inspection....yes! There is a water feature incorporated!

Not only a water feature...but a swingball too - The Lord has answered Magsters prayers - not quite a tennis court I grant you.....

Hazel,

About as interested in 'association football', perchance?

Tennis isn't as awful as golf and Formula 1 because it can be quite exciting - and the women can have nice legs - but it ranks slightly below cycling in my estimation.

What say you about having a re-enactment of the Battle of Agincourt in our garden?

"Edgbaston". Let me guess. Er, motor-racing

Why would anyone want a statue of Lenin in the garden?

I never got a double flake when I was a little girl Hazel, my parents were poor

Ali - would love to do a re-enactment, but is the garden really big enough for horses? (I do hope so)

CG - glad you're happy with the water feature

hello all

Magster, where did Lenin come from? It was quite unexpected

I thing we should stop on a Roller coster, plus few spooky rides and a LOOOOOVE canal

Magster - that's terrible! Have a instead

Legers... just you be careful where you put your hands when in that love canal...I have my reputation to think of you know.

Lenin where?

I think Legers new role in the house should be supersonic love stud. I am sure that will meet with his approval.